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TOEFL - It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city?


monamona 7 / 10  
Oct 2, 2011   #1
It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city? Do you agree or disagree?
Nowadays living is possible on every place of the world, but still there are some differences amoung them. From my point of view big cities can be a good place for bringing up children.

To begin with, it is undeniable that education is better in big cities in comparison with countrysides. For instance in my country the best schools,universities and institutes are located in cities, and todays education is one of the most important parts of our children's life.Therefore it is a good idea for children to past their first earlier life in the cities.

What is more, it is acknowledged that a large number of creational facilities are built in cities.Children who live in cities have a lot of entertainment. For example playgrounds, parks, science museums, cinemas etc. However, in countrysides we hardly ever see creational facilities. Children who live in countrysides most of the time pass their free time in farms.

Finally, in big cities children access to media easily, so they can learn a lot of things by watching television and surfing through the net.Via internet they can have connection with the other children all around the world, therefor they can exchange their knowledge, they can learn different cultures.

To sum up, although countrysides have some advantages such as fresh air , peace, and etc. Today's children needs somethings to entertain them, and occupy their leisure time in the best way.

basawang 10 / 76  
Oct 2, 2011   #2
Hi,

1. The prompt ask you to compare the countryside and the big city. But you do not mention any information of the countryside in the introduction. I strongly suggest you talk about the countryside in the first paragraph.

Nowadays living is possible on every place of the world, but still there are some differences amoung them.

This opening sentence is too broad and subjective. Living is possible on every place in the world?

How about a volcano?

2.

or instance in my country the best schools,universities and institutes are located in cities

I think you can clearly tell the readers the name of the country and cities in your example.

3.

Your second paragraph is about education.

Your third paragraph is about entertainment.

Your forth paragraph is about the Internet.

However, in the last paragraph, you only mention entertainment.

As I see, the summary is incomplete because you do not summarize all the three points you suggested.

4. "Internet" is a proper noun, so you have to capitalize "I".

Good luck


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