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[Toefl] essays are better to test students than the objective tests - writing task


combatant 2 / 3  
Sep 18, 2011   #1
Hi guys, this is how I am planning to write my essay in the exam. If you find anything bad in my writing please post me. This essay is all about lecture contradicting the reading. I cannot provide you the question as listening is also involved in this..thanks a lot in advance..

The article states that essays are better to test students than the objective tests and provides three reasons of support. However, the professor explains that objective tests are equally important and refutes each of the author's reasons.

First, the reading claims that objective tests test whether a student could memorize details and it does not test understanding of the concept. He also says that problems in real life require organizing and communicating their thoughts in a logical way which is tested through essays. The professor debunks this point by emphasizing the fact that memorizing of information is also very important. He states that in certain situations memorizing of information is necessary and there is no harm in memorizing information.

Second, the article posits that essays require information to be presented in writing and it is an important skill that students need to develop (that skill). However, the professor says that there is some problem in evaluting a person through writing. According to the professor, good writers will get good marks irrespective of the amount of information they know and a person who knows more information about the topic but,unable to present his ideas well will score less despite the fact that he knows more about the topic. so, this can be biased at times.

Third, the reading states that framing questions for essays doesnt take much time and saves lot of time for the professors who are really busy. The professor rebuts this point by explaining that it takes more time for the professor to evaluate essays and it can be troublesome if the class is very large. He also states that professor has to evaluate all the papers in a single sitting. He states about a study saying that if a professor evaluates same essay at two different timings, the results might be different because the mood of the professor comes into account. so, all the essays have to be evaluated in a single go which can be very difficult if the class is very big.

In conclusion, while the article states that essays evaluate students better, the professor disagrees. The professor states that both are equally important and tests should be made depending on the situation. He posits that tests can be made with both objective and essays in a single test which might test the students ability better.

I have certain doubts in writing this essay.
Which of the following sentences are correct:
Q1:

1)He also says that problems in real life require organizing and communicating their thoughts in a logical way which is tested through essays. The professor debunks this point by emphasizing the fact that memorizing of information is also very important.

2)He also says that problems in real life require organizing and communicating their thoughts in a logical way which is tested through essays. On the other hand, the professor debunks this point by emphasizing the fact that memorizing of information is also very important.

Can I use on the other hand, in this context. I am already stating that the professor opposes this...by adding on the other hand to the sentence will it make the passage more intelligible. Does it really make the sentence flow smooth?

Q2: Are there any grammatical mistakes in my writing?

Thanks a lot for your help.

SimonFromNaples 1 / 1  
Sep 18, 2011   #2
Some (non-professional) advice:
1) Firstly, secondly... instead of First, second...
2) "require organizing and communicating their thoughts" you may also say: "require students (or "them") to organize and communicate their thoughts".

3) "which is tested through essays" I would say "which can be tested through essays"
4) "On the other hand", I think you can use it, but I would suggest using a preposition or an adverb of time, like "He then debunks"

5) "memorizing of information" I am not sure that "of" is needed
6) "emphasizing the fact that memorizing of information is also very important" what about: emphasizing that the capacity (or "skill") of memorizing information is also very important (or "is important as well", or "plays a crucial role" or simply "is crucial")

Hope this helps!
OP combatant 2 / 3  
Sep 18, 2011   #3
thanks simonfromnaples!! very good insights..it really helps..


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