Unanswered [6] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3


IELTS Task 1 : A breakdown of the erosion process in a headland


hasdymath 11 / 25  
Nov 21, 2015   #1
A breakdown of the erosion process in a headland is presented in the diagram. Overall, it is clearly seen that time by time the headland gradually disappears, and the process continues for some natural steps without any affection of human.

To begin, beneath the base of the headland, there are weak areas, hollow lands caused by erosion, which is like a small cave. After that, the hollow land becomes huger, so the cave turns arch, where it is possibly shaped like Durdle, door, or Dorset. After the sea water beats against the hollow lands for long time, the roof of the headland disappears, and it gets wicker and wicker.

Following that, after being eroded, the stack area is separated from the headland. Whereas a frequency of water pressure causes a powerless area. Eventually, the roof of the separated land retreats, which effects virtually a half of the size lost. Consequently, the stack land falls into the sea, and creates stump.



akhfan 5 / 9 3  
Nov 21, 2015   #2
overall, well done dude.

Whereas a frequency of water pressure causes a powerless area.,.... (This is an uncomplete sentense in which "whereas" as a conjuntion word)
vangiespen - / 4,134 1449  
Nov 22, 2015   #3
Hasdi, you show a very good understanding of the chart provided and you have managed to express your thoughts well enough to get a passing grade on this task essay. While the grammar requires corrections, your efforts resulted in a well enough written essay. You also have to pay attention to your spelling. There were a few serious spelling errors that affected the meaning of your sentence. I will note those errors in my corrections. Here are my suggested corrections:

A breakdown of the erosion process in a headland is presented in the diagram. Overall, it is clearly seen that time by time THE PASSAGE OF TIME HAS CAUSED the headland TO gradually disappears, and . t The process continues for some natural steps without any affection of human. NATURALLY WITHOUT HUMAN INTERVENTION.

To begin, b Beneath the base of the headland, there are SOME weak areas, hollow lands caused by erosion, which is like ARE SIMILAR TO a small cave. After that, t The hollow land becomes huger LARGER, so the cave turns CREATES AN arch, where it is possibly shaped like SIMILAR TO THE ONES AT Durdle, door, or Dorset. After the sea water WAVES beats against the hollow lands for A long time, THEN the roof of the headland disappears, and it gets GETTING wicker and wicker WEAKER AND WEAKER.

Following that, after being eroded, the stack area is separated from the headland. Whereas a THE frequency of water pressure causes a powerless HEAVILY WEAKENED area. Eventually, the roof of the separated land retreats, which effects AFFECTING virtually a half of the size lost. Consequently, the stack land falls into the sea, and creates A stump.


Home / Writing Feedback / IELTS Task 1 : A breakdown of the erosion process in a headland
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳