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British people to spend time on phone calls - Writing Task 1 - Bar chart

Chaunguyen 1 / -  
May 10, 2020   #1

telephone calls in the uk

The bar chart provides the information about the billions of minutes that people in the UK spent on three different kinds of telephone calls between 1995 and 2002.

Overall, both nationaland international-fixed line and mobiles usages experienced an upward trend during the period, while local-fixed line usage showed a fluctuation and had the same figure to its 1995 at the end of the period.

As the bar chart shows, the number of local-fixed line call minutes was about 72% in 1995, being the highest in three different kinds of telephone calls, Then it increased significantly, reaching a peak of about 90% in 1999. Neverthless, the figure experienced a sharp decrease during he last three years and had the same time using telephone call to its 1995 at the end of the period.

The number of national and international-fixed line call minutes was less than 40% in 1995, and there was a gradual rise to the end of the period. It rose to over 60% in 2002. Likewise, mobiles usage was about 3% in 1995, being the lowest. Then it grew gradually to about 14% in 1999 and continued increasing dramatically to approximately 45% in 2002.

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Holt  Educational Consultant - / 12,280 3982  
May 10, 2020   #2
Your summary overview should have included the 3 types of phone calls made ( local - fixed line, national and international - fixed line, mobiles - all calls). The measurement type should have also been indicated (minutes by the millions), along with a clearer trending sentence. Your trend isn't really spelled out as a part of the summary overview in this presentation. A comparative statement is not the same as a trend in the usage. The trend is normally something that was constant in the presentation. Either an upward or downward trend based on the most prominent selection in the discussion.

If you are taking the CBT, make sure that you properly use the space bar. Improperly using it could create an LR error on your part. You made that error in this presentation when you did not use the space bar to separate the words "national and". You wrote it improperly as "nationaland". Spell checking is imperative in this task because your LR score depends on it. You should have easily spotted the "Neverthless" error (Nevertheless) if you did a visual spellcheck. Several other spelling errors which will definitely sink your LR score in an actual test setting.
RomanKoch 10 / 22 9  
May 10, 2020   #3
As the contributor said you did not indicate the measurement type, if you did you would have noticed that in your essay you were using % instead of minutes (billions).

You used the end of the period too many times, better to paraphrase to avoid repetitions.

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