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"broken chopsticks" - letter to the shop manager; writing task in IELTS 8


sam4 1 / 1  
Jun 15, 2014   #1
Dear sir or Madam,
I write to you as some of chopsticks which was bought from your shop last week were broken. I only found the problem when I open the package at home. Your clerk had said your goods had very good quality when I was shopping. But the fact now is that many of the chopsticks can not be useful.

I called your shop yesterday to describe this thing. However, your employee said he was not sure of that the commodities were destroyed by ourselves. So he can not solve the problem for me. I was very angry when I heard what he was saying. The wares could not be seen as defective when the package is intact.

Then, I ask you for a new package of chopsticks for exchange. And if these chopsticks in the new package are broken too, I would claim for refound. I wish to look forward to your quick reply.

Yours faithfully,
Sam
merve - / 4 1  
Jun 15, 2014   #2
I am writeing to you as some of chopsticks which was bought (who bought them) from your shop last week were broken((not clear if you broke them or they were already broken when you purchased the box)

My suggestion is as follows :

I am writing this letter to inform you that last week I purchased a box of chopsticks from your shop and some of them came out broken.
merve - / 4 1  
Jun 15, 2014   #3
I only found that outthe problem when I opened the package at home.

Your clerk had said your goods had very good quality when I was shopping. But the fact now is that many of the chopsticks can not be useful.

*general rule : but /and/or connect two sentences.

My suggestion is as follows :

Sales clerk told me that your good are of good quality while I was shopping but the broken chopsticks that came out from the box is implying otherwise.
OP sam4 1 / 1  
Jun 17, 2014   #4
Thanks! I will notice that.


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