hello, i made this essay and i had trouble putting more metaphors in it. can u help me change some of my words and check my grammar too pls.i already read it many times and i dunno what to add anymore. its a narrative essay about the day that i moved in california. thanks
"Ladies and gentlemen, we just landed in Los Angeles Airport." These were the few words that I remember from my flight from the Philippines to California. It was eight at night and the sky was filled with stars, just like my stomach was filled with butterflies, because of the excitement that I was feeling. "Finally, I am here." I whispered. All I could see were a bunch of other planes outside the window, but I was still delighted because of the fact that it was my first time.
A lot of the passengers could not wait to stand up and get out of the plane even though they just woke up from the long flight. Everyone just wanted to go home and rest. It was an exhausting 13-hour flight. Thank God I was able to sleep during the flight. We finally came to a full stop. "It is now safe to removed your seatbelt," the flight attendant announced. I stood up from my chair and stretched for about five seconds while I took another glanced at the window. I reached out for my heavy backpack in the compartment then I prepared to get out of the plane just like everybody else.
It took only about 10 minutes before they finally opened the door, but it felt like it was an hour. Slowly, the passengers started to move to get out of the plane. As I was walking towards the door, the flight attendants and the pilots were there by the door to say goodbye to the passengers. I smiled back at them as I thanked them for a memorable fly. I continued to walk, walk and walk. It was the longest walk I have ever had in an airport. I asked myself, "When is this going to end?" I was already feeling tired and that long walk in the airport with my heavy backpack just added up to it.
Finally, I reached the immigration and I had to stand and wait in the long line, so they can check my immigration papers. Inch by inch, I was getting closer to the end of the line and inch by inch, I was feeling more exhausted. While I was waiting, I continued to look around and observed the other people walking around the big airport. Half an hour later, my turn came and it went well. They welcomed me and gave me the permission to legally reside in the United States.
Right after the immigration, I went to look for my huge blue luggage. It did not take me that long to find it. I could already see it even from afar. It was the only luggage that was left. As I walked to get it, there were so many things that were going through my mind, but the only thing that I wanted to think at that moment was the excitement of seeing my brother and my mother. I have not seen them for years and I could not wait to feel them around my arms. So I hurriedly grabbed my luggage and I immediately headed to the lobby.
As I took the last turn towards the waiting area, I saw my brother and my mother right away. My blank face suddenly was enlightened by a smile on it . I saw my brother first, leaning on the grill while waiting for me. He still looked the same from the last time I saw him, except that he gained a little weight. When I looked at his left hand side, I saw my joyful mother. Her eyes looked watery that she was about to tear from the happiness of seeing her lovely daughter. We quickly walk towards each other that I did not mind pushing my heavy luggage. Then I hugged them so tight for quite some time like a scene from a drama series on the television. No words came out of my mouth yet. I was speechless.
After a few minutes, we started to walk to the parking lot as I tried to redeem myself. When I walked out of the door of the airport, I felt the cold October breeze touched my face. "It is almost winter time." My brother told me. It was completely different to the weather I grew up with, from a very humid climate to a chilly weather condition.
Not long after, we got in the car and they started asking me questions. At first I did not know where to start, then after a minute, I started answering their questions. Stories just continuously flowed out of my mouth until I was enthralled by the whole different place I was seeing. My brother smoothly drove the car while I looked outside the window. I was overwhelmed with the wide freeways with a lot of fast cars and numerous lights in the city.
Half an hour later, we finally got to my brother's house. I stepped out of the car, I took a deep breath and I just stared at the house. Seconds after, my brother came to me, he wrapped his arms around my shoulders as we both looked at the house then he said, "This is now your new home, welcome home!"
