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Cambridge IELTS 10 Writing Task 1 - Sales of fairtrade-labelled bananas and coffee


mahfuj840 2 / 1  
Feb 1, 2022   #1

two tables analysis



The tables summarise the sales of fairteade-labelled cofee and bananas in the UK, Switzerland, Denmark, Belgium, and Sweden between 1999 and 2004. As a general trend, the revenues made by selling bananas and coffees in 2004 was higher than in 1999 in the majority of the countries.

A glance at the tables revels that the trading of coffee in the UK leaped from 1.5 millions of euros to 20 during the timespan of 6 years, making itself the leading coffee selling country in the final year. Switzerland, Denmark, Belgium, and Sweden also shows an expansion in their business but at a slow rate. The figure for Switzerland climbed from 3 to 6. Denmark made 2 million euros in 2003, which were 1.8 million back in 1999. The amount grew from 1 to 1.7 and 0.8 to 1 for Belgium and Sweden respectively.

The UK dominated the banana market both in 1999 and 2004 by uplifting their sale from 15 million euros in the first year while roughly quadrupling the figure in the final year. Switzerland, Denmark, and Belgium also raised their profit during the period. The only exception is Sweden which eventually decreased their trading of banana from 2 to 0.9 million euros in the duration.



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4773  
Feb 2, 2022   #2
The tables

The writer used the correct term in the sense that the plural form of the singular word "table" was used. However, by not indicating the number of tables involved in the presentation (There are 2 tables presented), a lack of clarity was formed in the sentence presentation. The reader must immediately know how many images are presented, and what each table represents in order to create a proper mental picture of the reporting basis.

between 1999 and 2004

This should have been presented as a second paragraph. This is necessary in order to seperate the image information from the rest of the information presentation. Since this is the yearly coverage reference, it needs its own sentence presentation. Again, this is for clarity purposes. Each sentence must contain only 1 thought presentation in order to achieve the required sentence clarity in every paragraph.

As a general trend

Good work. This trending sentence is well placed. However, it failed to present the value of money used for the measurement (millions). So, why it is good and clear, it needed another bit of highlighted information to complete the summary.

A glance at the tables

Is this the first or second image? Clarify and use the table title as reference. This is to be presented in the singular form of tables as well since there is only one image for coffee and another for bananas.

For a clear comparison analysis and report, both reporting paragraphs must refer to the image that it is anchored to. Good work with the report though. It is acceptable and will get a passing mark. It would have gotten a better score if my observations above were corrected prior to submission for scoring.
frr0717 1 / 1  
Feb 3, 2022   #3
Suggestions
between 1999 to 2004 => in the span of 6 years starting from 1999

the timespan => the sepctrum


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