please edit and rate my essay! I'm new here and I need your help! thanks a lot~~~
Topic: do you agree or disagree with the following statement?
"The automobile is destroying our quality of life?
That is obviously to see that automobile is one of the great invention of people in the twentieth century. The advantages of automobile such as ability to deliver people and goods to any location we want with a litter amount of time has helped people can contact with other and contribute to development of business. However, there are some disadvantages from automobile make me believe that the automobile is destroying our quality of life such as air pollution, car accident, and make our economic depend on oil of few countries.
To begin with, most of people have no doubts that automobile is cause of some pollution, especially air pollution and it contributes to increase greenhouse effect. The exhausts from the car are composed by many chemical substances, when they spread out to the environment; they will reaction with others substances and result of which are some poison smogs can damage human health. The main substance from car's exhausts is the carbon dioxide, which is main cause of greenhouse effect.
The secondly, car accident is the fear of almost people around the world, because it kills a thousand of people each year and makes large number of people were injured. New technology has helped automobile has higher speed, it helps we can move faster and save more time, but it also brings more harm for driver and for people who often walk on the road because of the speed out of driver's control. In addition, too much car makes transport in the big city are more difficult because of traffic jam, it make people get tress out and waste a lot of time and money.
Finally, most of automobile use oil and products of oil, so it makes our economic depend on oil of few countries. Therefor, any change in oil price can be cause of economic and politic crisis. Moreover, oil exploitation became more difficult and dangerous; it can damage environment and ecosystem.
In conclusion, the car has helped people a lot, but the negative effects of automobile exceed the positive effects, and the automobile is destroying our quality of life. So, people should look for other transport in order to replace the automobile or at least improve the automobile to prevent its negative effects.
i think the first line can be rewritten as
"It is obvious that the automobile is one of the great inventions of the twentieth century".
The advantages of automobiles such as the ability to
delivertransport people and goods to any location we want with a litter amount ofwithin a short time has helped people canto be in contact with each other and contribute towards the development of business.
However, there are some disadvantages
fromof automobileswhich make me believe that the automobile isthey are destroying our quality of life, such as,by causing air pollution, car accidents, and makemaking our economies depend on oil ofthe few countries that produce oil.
lamktqd , I think your essay needs heavy editing but that may leave the final product seemingly unoriginal. So, i suggest you pick up a good grammar book and go through the fundamentals, then rewrite the essay and post it here for a review.