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The causing related to the escalating number of crime rate and some possible solutions to tackle it.


dils 20 / 33 2  
Oct 28, 2016   #1
Each year, the crime rate increases. What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?

Significantly, the rate of criminality increase every year. In keeping with that, this is essay will elaborate the causes related this escalating number of crime rate and some possible solutions to tackle it.

There are three approaches to explain the increase in crime rate. Firstly, from economic point of view, it is because of unemployment and the lack of job demand, in case of that the people take a shortcut to commit crime due to fulfill the daily needs. Secondly, from social point of view, the tendency toward social inequality in which the people from lower economic class feel oppressed by the upper and middle class. Thirdly, from the standpoint of culture, the lack of tolerance among the diverse culture tends to cause conflict and leads to a crime.

However, there are several ways can be done due to overcome this problem. Firstly, enabling participation of parents and educational institutions in educating the children as the future generation to have a high value of morality. In addition, it all coming back to the legal sanction, provide strict penalty is required to bring a deterrent effect to other people in order that they do not do the same. Furthermore, it is of course regarding with improvement to the previous three area; economic, social, and culture that cause the preference to involve in criminality.

In conclusion, even though criminality is a serious issue, there are several steps that the government can do to prevent the increase of its rate. Concerns with that, as the whole society have willingness to join hands, it may be possible that the crime rate will decrease.

alfa7 19 / 26 1  
Oct 28, 2016   #2
Hi Dils, I want you obtain some suggestions from me,

here we go

... this is essay will elaborate the causingof this problem related to this escalating number ...

1. make sure your essay is not bias with draw you word completely.
2. "related" should follow by "to"


... lack of job demand, in this case of that the people take a shortcut to commit crime due toduring to in the fact that fulfill the daily needs.

... of view, the tendency of toward social (...) from lower economic classstatus feel oppressed by the upper and middle classstatus .

"due to" is presposition, which following by gerund or noun.

In addition, it all comescoming back to the legal sanction, [you need a conjunction in here] provide strict penalty is required to bring a ...

Concerns with that, as the whole society have willingness ... [make sure your conclusion was summarize all of your thought]
ifraanisa05 44 / 70 6  
Oct 28, 2016   #3
Hai dils, here are my suggestions about your essay

Significantly, the rate of criminality increaseincreases every year.

i think, in introductory paragraph in writing task 2, you have to make at least 2-3 sentences and you do not need to write down 'this is essay will.....' you can give a point about your task response in general.


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