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'Change will change a person' - avoiding change essay

sandeepkale 3 / 4  
Aug 30, 2010   #1
Hello I am going to take the test of IELTS. Please check this

In today's cutting edge era, all things have developed with technical and scientific breakthroughs more rapidly than our expectations. This has become possible because of adapting new ideas and innovations. Some people do not like changing in their life and they insist on same things and same jobs.

However, In last decade, most of things have absolutely changed due to technical and scientific breakthroughs. People think that, these changing makes them inconvenient and unpleasant in the life. Therefore, they resist on their views and always try to avoid new things in their job. There are a number of ways behind this, first, such people's feelings are orthodox. Second, those are lazy and inefficient always boast against new adoptions and changes. Third, they want to show that their past jobs were more efficient and appropriate for respect. In this way, they try to accomplish respect more than their expectation to keep themselves happy. Lets we have an example of Indian farmer, they ponder higher educated children would not respect their thoughts and feelings, as a result of that, they do not like their children to achieve high degrees of education.

This is true " if a person does not change him according to change, then change will change hm". In an organization, old employees do not like, their old system should be updated with advanced computer system because they can not see that their respected job would be grabbed by new efficient ones. But this change could solve a lot of problem related to time consumption. Furthermore, changes are adopted and accepted by philanthropists whose intention is to make their countries well developed and entire world prosperous. Today all type of work can be executed with the help of advanced devices and techniques with full skillfulness and expertness within no time that is why it is difficult to be agreed with this statement.

Hence, a conclusion can be drawn from above arguments, that adopting new changes, we can see our world more prosperous and advanced, providing a new jobs opportunities with new skills and new techniques, on the other hand, such achievements will help people with new comforts, luxurious things and excised facilities all over their life.

EF_Kevin 8 / 13,334 129  
Sep 1, 2010   #2
In today's cutting edge era

Cutting edge refers to the most advanced technology, which exists in every era... so I think this needs to be reworked...

That first para is too short and needs a thesis statement added to the end of it.

You misuse some words here:
There are a number of ways reasons behind this. First, such people's feelings are orthodox. Second, they are lazy and inefficient, always boast resisting against new innovations and changes. ..

It is true that, "If a person does not change himself according to changes in his environment, then environmental chang es will change him." In an organization, old employees do not like their old systems being updated with advanced computer system because they cannot see that their methods w ill be replaced by newer, more efficient ones.

Keep practicing English! You have great ideas, but you have mistakes, too. Do you have questions about any of these changes? Please practice typing the correct way, as we showed you.

You can make another post in this thread with improvements and corrections based on the feedback we gave you.


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