Changes of the propotion of population aged 65 and over

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

elderly residents in Japan, Sweden, and the USA

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

The given line graph illustrates the percentage of residents whose age are 65 and over in Japan, Sweden, and the USA from 1940 to 2040.
As can be seen from the graph, it is clearly evident that the aged population of three countries is expected to increase over the course of 100 years, starting from 1940.

In 1940, the rate of elderly American registered the highest among the three, standing at around 8%. This proportion continued to grow to 15% in 1980, before reaching its predicted peak at nearly 25% in 2040. Besides, Sweden also experienced the same trend between 1940 and 1980. However, the percentage of elderly Swedish is forecasted to some fluctuations over the next 60 years, before a soar to 25%. On the other hand, the ratio of 65-and-over citizens in Japan experienced a downward trend in the initial 20 years and then remained unchanged at approximately 4% in the following 30 years. After that, there will be a gradual growth to 10% in the next 4 decades, before soaring by more than 15% at the end of the time frame.

(184 words)

The given line graph illustrates the percentage of residents whose age are 65 and over in Japan, Sweden, and the USA from 1940 to 2040.
As can be seen from the graph, it is clearly evident that the aged population of three countries is expected to increase over the course of 100 years, starting from 1940.

In 1940, the rate of elderly American registered the highest among the three, standing at around 8%. This proportion continued to grow to 15% in 1980, before reaching its predicted peak at nearly 25% in 2040. Besides, Sweden also experienced the same trend between 1940 and 1980. However, the percentage of elderly Swedish is forecasted to some fluctuations over the next 60 years, before a soar to 25%. On the other hand, the ratio of 65-and-over citizens in Japan experienced a downward trend in the initial 20 years and then remained unchanged at approximately 4% in the following 30 years. After that, there will be a gradual growth to 10% in the next 4 decades, before soaring by more than 15% at the end of the time frame.

(184 words)

• 
  
  

Dang, even though you wrote more than the required 150 words, there are a number of errors in your analytical presentation. The first is that you do not have an accurate summary overview for the essay. The second, is the lack of the 4 paragraph presentation. The third, is a lack of comparison analysis based on the overlapping points in the chart. Last, is your misformatted paragraph presentations. You have a 6 sentence paragraph presentation, one sentence more than the maximum of 5 sentences. Do not compress all of the information into one paragraph. Don't rush your analysis. Divide the presentation on a per country basis. That is how you can best present the analysis of the information.

Let me start by showing a more accurate summary overview.

A line graph has been presented for analysis based on the sixty five year old and over population of Japan, Sweden, and the USA. The proportion for the aging population was measured based on a 2 decade gap starting in 1940 with a prediction for the population rate by the year 2040. The overall trend shows that Japan will have the highest population based on the reported ages by the year 2040. This essay will analyze the trend in growth percentage based on a 2 decade basis, as well as make comparisons regarding overlapping percentages of the 3 countries whenever possible.

From that point, the remaining paragraphs could have been alloted in the following manner:

Paragraph 2 - Japan information with overlapping comparisons prior to the transition sentence into the next paragraph.
Paragraph 3 - Sweden data, again with the same overlapping information requirement for the 3 countries. The transition statement is at the end of the comparison discussion.

Paragraph 4 - USA information presented in a better and clearer detail due to the meeting points of the provided percentage data from the first 2 countries

As with all Task 1 essays, no conclusion is required because this is an analytical essay, not a discussion essay.