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Today's charity - support made by wealthy nations must be voluntary


Lazira 1 / -  
Jul 2, 2014   #1
Today charity becomes an essential part of personal or even national well-being. In common public opinion developed industrial countries are supposed to help poor countries by sharing their fortune with them. In this case I would argue that people of wealthy nations have to be required for any support they make.

Money flow to the poorest nations in Africa and Asia continents rises magnificently during the last decade. However the process of controlling whether the cash reaches its final destination is still does not work. In order to avoid corruption in state government the new system of support was implemented, as providing food and education, which still has the elements of misuse of funds. The cases when supplied food was sold, and the children of state officials won scholarships are well-known.

Furthermore the government of poorer nations takes this assistance for granted, without making any attempts to improve current situation. Why one nation should learn international experience of problem-solving, elaborate programs, plans of developing different sectors of economy, analyze and meticulously dissecting positive and negative effect of their management, whilst other leaders focuses on their prosperity. As a great example of 20 century may be introduced rapidly developing Singapore, which vividly represents the hard and intensive work of state managers, while the amount from foreign aid transferred to this country was much less than those spending to African nations.

To conclude, I believe that any support made by wealthy nations must be voluntary excluding permanent basis. Meanwhile not hoping for outside aid government w

Sabi Thapaa 3 / 5 1  
Jul 4, 2014   #2
the concluding part is not complete.
dumi 1 / 6,928 1592  
Jul 15, 2014   #3
It is always good to mention the purpose of your writing, for example - TOEFL, IELTS, in the title itself for others to provide you with more task related comments and feedbacks. Also, include the full prompt in the post so that we can have a better understanding about what it really requires.

In the eyes of common public opinion, developed industrial countries are supposed toshould help poor countries by sharing their fortunewealth and resources with them.poorer nations.
Pahan 1 / 1,906 553  
Jul 15, 2014   #4
Money flow to the poorest nations in African and Asian continents riseshas risen magnificently during the last decade.

However the process of controlling whether the cash reaches its final destination is still does not work.

Well... this sentence is pretty confusing.... it is not conveying a clear idea.... you have grammar errors too :(

You have a tendency to combine too many ideas and put them all in one sentence. That gets you to make grammatical mistakes and have a poor flow of ideas. You need to concentrate more on clarity of your ideas and sentences. That is what helps you arouse reader's interest in your writing.


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