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Writing task 1 - the chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010.

linhnpt19 1 / 2  
Aug 27, 2021   #1

consumer goods expenditures in the UK and France

The given bar chart demonstrates the cost of five different goods (cars, computers, books, perfume and, cameras) in two nations in 2010. Units are measured in pounds sterling.

In general, the most noticeable difference was seen in the spending on cameras between France and the Uk.
Now, turning to details, people in the UK used cars at just over 450,000 slightly more than in France, which stood at 400,000. The spending of the British on books was also higher than that of the French ( just over 400,000; 300,000 respectively ). Furthermore, the British spent money on Camera (well above 350,000) high was more twice as much as the French (150,000).

Turning to the two remaining goods that were spent more than in France. Above 350,000 was costed by the French on computers, the British were lower than, stood at exactly 350,000. The final good is perfume, which was expended at 200,000 in France and, at just under 150,000 in the UK.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,250 4653  
Aug 28, 2021   #2
in two nations

Vague references int he summary overview are unacceptable. The 2 countries are specifically referred to as France and the UK in the image presentation. Indicate the names of the countries as a part of the accurate summary overview. Divide the statement into 2 sentences as well. This will help add to the clarity of the presentation in a manner that clearly seperates the 2 information presentations, leading do a more coherent paragraph statement. The writer reversed his country reference. He placed the specific infomation in the trending sentence when it should have been a part of the overview, and then a general reference in the trending statement.

final good

- Final product

Good refers to an adjective, noun, or interjection. It does not have anything to do with general number references. While goods makes reference to possessions and personal property.

Further grammar errors exist in thsi presentation, but these 2 are the ones that are the most marked because these change the sentences that they are located in.
thien le 2 / 8 3  
Aug 29, 2021   #3
in order to avoid repeat structure you can use " in relation to/ compared with..." in comparative sentences
For example,Above 350,000 pounds ... on computers,the British were lower than, stood at exactly 350,000

In addition, I also think you should write measure behind figures. This will raise your score.
OP linhnpt19 1 / 2  
Aug 29, 2021   #4
@thien le
Thanks for your advices!

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