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Both charts gave the readers a glance of the education rates of different levels across the world


ellie8615 1 / 1 1  
Nov 22, 2017   #1

Global education rates



Both charts gave the readers a glance of the education rates of different levels across various areas in the world.
We can apparently find that Europe has the highest education rate among all the areas in both secondary education and higher education. Latin America and East Asia come to the second, followed by sub-Saharan Africa.

Another obvious fact is that no matter which area in the world, less people continue to receive higher education after their secondary education. Even in Europe, where almost everyone goes to school for secondary education, the ratio of receiving higher education drops by 50% to only half of the adult population. Same phenomenon can also be found in Latin America and east Asia but not in sub-Saharan Africa, in contrast to its counterpart, this area have a higher ratio of higher education compared to secondary education.



Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,797 4780  
Nov 22, 2017   #2
Ellie, this essay will get an automatic failing score because you wrote only 141 words when the minimum is 150 words for this sort of essay. The reason you fell short is because you only have 2 paragraphs when the minimum requirement for task 1 is 3 paragraphs. If you had written at least 3 paragraphs, then you would have been assured of writing at least the minimum word count. Since this is a 2 illustration essay, you could have easily written it this way for a higher score:

Par. 1 - Summary overview with discussion instruction indicated
Par. 2 - Bar chart 1 information
Par. 3 - Bar chart 2 information
Par. 4 - Comparison information

There wasn't even a need to write a concluding paragraph as that is not required in an analytical essay of the task 1 type. I will not even continue to read the rest of your essay or advice you on the content because you missed the more important element, the opening summary, which would have set the tone for the overall information disseminated through this essay. It will be foolish of me to score something or advice on something that is part of a defective essay. The examiner would have also failed you by that point as well.


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