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WRITING TASK II - CHILDCARE CENTERS


kiki23 37 / 64 4  
Oct 22, 2016   #1
Some parents think that childcare centers provide the best services for children of pre-school age. Other working parents think that family members such as grandparents will be better cares for their kids. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

The childcare centers providing early educational system for children are believed by some working parents as the right place to keep their children. However, the rest assume grandparents or others family members will perform better to keep their children safe. Even tough family member is one of the trustworthy person that parents can rely on, I am more likely to stand that children should be safeguarded by the childcare centers because it has several system which are suitable for the children growth.

It is commonly happened that some parents are depending to their parents to take care of their children while they are working. As grandparents are having the same experience for years, they believe grandparents will be more responsible and trustworthy to protect their children. The survey conducted by Australia Childcare Commission in 2010 showed that only 43% of parents nowadays trusting their parents to protect their children in working hours as they believe grandparents are become elder and not strong enough. It is can be seen from the survey that not even a half of the society relies on their parents to take care of their children.

However, many people assume the childcare centers are providing best materials and services in nursing and babysitting their children. As the childcare centers is being paid, it is not only nursing and babysitting children in working hours but also giving them early education and nutritional meal during keeping time. The same survey conducted by Australia Childcare Commission in 2010 showed the reverse of trusting grandparents to treat their children, as much as 57% of parents prefer to choose childcare centers regarding to some advantages served by it. From the fact, it is clearly true most of people more likely to believe childcare centers to take care of their children in working hours.

To sum up, both childcare centers and family member bring benefit for parents to take care of their children where some parents believe childcare centers will give their children pre-school education and the rest think grandparents as the most trustworthy person to babysit their children. Where possible, children not only should be taken care but also taught early.
justivy03 - / 2,366 607  
Oct 22, 2016   #2
Hi Risky, I have a few suggestions to enhance the last part of your essay;

- To sum upOverall , both childcare
- centers and family members can bring benefit
- forto parents to takein taking care of their children,
- wherewhile some parents believe
- asare the most trustworthy person
- to babysit and teach their children.
- Where possible, children not only should not only be be taken cared of but also taught early.

There you have it Risky, with the first 3 paragraphs, there's not really a lot to enhance, however, upon proof reading your essay, I believe the final paragraph needs that improvement as you can see with the above remarks and corrections, I hope you follow through for the benefit of a well written essay. Keep writing.


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