IELTS: Children from poorer families are more successful in the future life.

Children who are brought up in families that do not have large amounts of money are better prepared to deal with the problems of adult life than children brought up by wealthy parents. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

According to some people, child who is brought up in less well-off family is more quick-witted and can tackle with an adult life problems better than who is from affluent ones. However, I completely disagree with this position.

To begin with, children from poorer families are prone to have bad habits such as: crime, thievery and thuggery. Moreover, these people will not have an access to a good education. As a result, they can be proselytized into bad isms. For example, most of the terroristic groups try to attract uneducated people, because the person with better education has a wider outlook, which will allow no brainwash. In this sense, people with lower level of education have more proneness to be attracted in such isms.

Nevertheless, people who are born in well-off families have access to good education, which will have a positive impact on their later life. Secondly, children from rich families have better skills on how to use money, because they use it a lot of times. Finally, wealthy families can afford better health services and costly medicines, which will be very beneficial for the health of a child. For instance, many good medicines cost vast amounts of money, which cannot be afforded by poorer families.

In conclusion, I disagree with the opinion that children who are brought up in less well-of families are, likely, more successful in the future life due to aforementioned reasons.

this is too short,
it seems to me that in introduction paragraph, you should attract the reader's attention, so you should put some sentences which are interesting

According to some people, child who is brought up in less well-off family is more quick-witted and he or she can tackle with an adult life problems in adult life better than who isa child comes from an affluent onesfamily


Well, this does not seem to be directly aligned with your opinion. In the body paras you need to justify your opinion by giving reasons as to why you hold that opinion and then support them with examples.

Well, you should have had one reason here and supported with a specific example. If it is the "access to good education", then you could have elaborated on that and given an example to convince the point to the reader.

Very few feedbacks I am getting from EF:(((
Thank you Pahan, dumi and fikri))

Hey... you've got feedbacks from at least three guys :D Something is better than nothing ....LOL
To begin with, children coming from poorer families are more prone to have bad habits such as: crime, thievery and thuggery.get into bad behaviors such as thuggery, stealing, drug addiction etc. due to the socio-economic pressures they face.

In conclusion, I disagree with the opinion that children who are brought up in less well-ofwell off families are, likely, more successful in the future life due to aforementioned reasons.

You write too well and that's why you get lesser number of comments :D

Yeah, you're right:) Thank you for all :D