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Citizens should be able to save all the money they earn and shouldn't give tax for their authorities


phucthai1215 1 / -  
Jul 5, 2018   #1
people should keep all the money they earn and sould not pay taxes to the state. Do you agree or disagree?

100% of earned money to the pocket



It is believed that citizens should save all the money they earn and should not give tax for their authority. While, I think this policy exerts many positive effects, I hold the opinion that that they should dedicated a part of their incoming to the governments' budget.

On the one hand, there are some advantages of keeping money for their own. Firstly, most inhabitants live in large cities with high cost of living even though their income can be extremely low. Specifically, there would be likely be a variety of high quality goods and services accompanied by high prices, which means that to afford them, citizens need to work hard and save as much as possible. White collar workers in Vietnam, for instance, have spent over half of their monthly salary just on hiring small rooms in urban sprawls, which makes it convenient for them to commute to their working places. Without a saving plan for such payment, there is no way for them to inhibit in urban areas. Secondly, many city dwellers need to pay for entertainment services including mixing with their peers at the end of weeks or watching movies or travelling, which is extremely essential for getting motivated and refreshing themselves for next working weeks. Obviously, the more money, they can keep, the more things they can do to enjoy life better.

On the other hand, I strongly believe that despites pressing issues of saving for every day expenses, as a citizen, allocating a small amount of money to the authority's budget not only benefit their nation but also for tax payers themselves. The first reason is that public money is likely to go to investments in building or upgrading infrastructures including roads, housing, bridges and specially tourist attraction. These new or updated facilities makes it possible for in habitants to travel quicker place to place within cities and have more things to relaxation. Another reason is that the government often gives priority to improve healthcare. Well-trained doctors, nurses and advanced medical technology eventually, for instance, can help those paying tax have longer life expectancy, thereby living a more happy life.

In conclusion, despites the necessaries of keeping money for every day expenses, I believe that citizens should spend more or less money they earn on paying tax to receive better healthcare systems and infrastructures.

Holt - / 7,528 2001  
Jul 6, 2018   #2
Phuc, you totally changed the discussion prompt for this essay. It appears to me that you misunderstood the prompt question, which is why you ended up giving the wrong response as an opinion for discussion. Let's compare the original prompt topic, reason, and instruction with what you wrote in the opening paraphrase:

Original topic: people should keep all the money they earn
Reason: sould not pay taxes to the state
Opinion Question: Do you agree or disagree?

Your topic: citizens should save all the money they earn (CORRECT)
Reason: should not give tax for their authority (Wrong)
Discussion Opinion: While, I think this policy exerts many positive effects, I hold the opinion that that they should dedicated a part of their incoming to the governments' budget. (Wrong)

Let me explain the 2 mistakes in your opening statement.

1. The opinion is that people should not give taxes to the government. When you say "give tax for their authority", you mean to say that they have to pay taxes in order to have some sort of power over something like say, the government. That is wrong. What you should have said was "pay taxes to authorities." That is the phrase that best paraphrases the original prompt.

2. The instruction is for you to pick one opinion, either you agree or disagree, you can never say your opinion covers both sides as this is a single opinion essay, and then discuss the singular opinion that you support with justifications and reasonings. Your reasoning is nowhere near the required response. This is not a comparison essay, which is the manner you discussed it in. So you would get a failing score in terms of task accuracy, which could lead to an overall failing score for the essay as well.

Sample paraphrase for this essay:

There has been an ongoing discussion as to whether or not people should pay taxes for money they earn. People tend to analyze if it is proper to ask people to compensate the government for their earnings through taxes. I don't agree with this statement due to a few reasons.

Try to use replacement words that would help you restate the original prompt in a manner closer in meaning to the original. Be careful of your word choices because if you use a word that sounds correct but has a different meaning, you end up changing the prompt for the discussion. I believe that is what happened in this instance and it can be easily avoided if you can manage to better understand the requirements of the original prompt and you have the opportunity to carefully choose the words you will use in the opening paraphrase.


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