In your intro, weighing the statements ,which must emphasize most, is the thing that needs to be considered. As instance, you better place first this, "I contend that the achievements of the rulers, poets, scientists are meant for the welfare of the people" on the second sentence. Then, support it with relevant details. We call this as placement by emphasis.
The claim and the reason clearly state that the indication of a great nation depends on the welfare of its people, disregarding the contribution of the rulers, poets, scientists. On the contrary, I contend that the achievements of the rulers, poets, scientists are meant for the welfare of the people. A great nation is symbolized by the wellness of the common people , the people and the rulers, poets, scientists and so on. The wellness of the people is judged by the mental, political, social environment provided by the rulers.
t first, a great nation is characterized by the level of welfare that it provides..
Tang dynasty in China at that time maintained a civil-social...
On the other hand, if the ruler..
..deprived fromtheir common welfare but also from their general rights...
Be aware of the transition of time.
For example, the people of Afghanisthan, who faced three decades of war( past time is manifested through it). They did not have the minimum welfare for their development. They even lost the opportunity to study, which in turn affected the development of the nation. Therefore, it can be seen fromabove that welfare of the common people is prerequisite to a great nation.
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