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The clothes indicate what kind of persons we are - IELTS TASK 2


Abraham22 20 / 11 15  
Sep 21, 2015   #1
Some people say that the clothes people wear are the most important indication of what they are like. Others, however, say that people should not be judged by the clothes they wear.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.


A proverb said do not judge a book by its cover. These days, some people believe that the standardization level of human quality is able to be determined through the use of dress. Moreover, others argue that what they wear is uncertain as same as what they guess in the first impression. While, getting a dress with the highest quality is as a social attribute determining the quality of life for some, I argue that it is also undetermined to judge the social status of individual as most inhabitants only want to seem like the rich.

At the first glance, Putting on a luxurious dress determines the living standard of the people. Clothes dressed is absolutely expensive and only the rich who have a high social status can afford it. As seen, like celebrities, they always get all dolled up in a wide range of event in order to attract every single eye surrounded them. What they wear, certainly, figures out their status in social level. As a result, strata of society can be seen the way of what they wear. If individuals put on a luxurious wear, it means they are the richest.

However, it is evident that everyone would like to seem wealthy in front of the society by using attractive dress. It occurs as an effect of modernization, which is rapidly developed encouraging them to live excessive. A recent study of social psychology had revealed that self-esteem is the fundamental behaviour of individual who is obtained by inhabitants surrounded them in order that they will be more appreciated. It means that the use of interesting dress affects toward people's opinion about themselves.

Personally, I reckon the statement depends on how far the viewpoint is to judge people. If individuals only own one side to size up the social strata about wearing clothes, it will bring out the presumption of innocence. On the other hand, If they possess two points of view, the people will be wiser in appraising the others.
vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Sep 21, 2015   #2
Abraham, I sincerely wish that you would better present your introduction statements. Once again you have presented a confusing statement that, I am sure, makes sense in your native tongue, but you are having a problem translating to English.

In your first paragraph, you can remove the term 'word' in relation to 'proverb' in order to create the proper English sentence for it. It should read as " A proverb said 'do not judge a book by its cover.' " By the way, that is a very strong way to open the essay. It shows your point of view at the very start of the essay. You need to reword the rest of the essay to indicate that "While some believe that first impressions are created by clothes, and others believe that the brand of clothes dictate the financial worth of a person, I believe that the clothes do not truly indicate anything social or personal about the person wearing it."

In your second paragraph, you can do directly to your statement about celebrities and the way they dress. The first sentence in the paragraph becomes redundant because you are saying the same thing at the end of the paragraph. It is important to avoid repeating yourself because the sentences then become word fillers and do not really help to increase the confidence of your English thinking skills.

As for the third paragraph. Try not to mention any other sources of information if you cannot quote the source directly. It leaves a question regarding the validity of your argument when the reader cannot confirm the said information for themselves. With these types of essays, it is important to use personal experience as part of your justification process. That is because nobody can question a personal experience and it helps to show the examiner that you understand the prompt very well as you found a personal connection with the prompt and its supporting arguments.

Those are some of the thoughts that came to my mind as I reviewed your essay. I hope to take the comments constructively and use it to help you develop your English skills :-) You really have the potential to pass this test. We just need to clean up your grammar. You have the comprehension part in the bag :-) You already understand the prompt. You just need to be able to reconcile your mother tongue with the English translations.
eddies [Contributor] 25 / 1,208 476  
Sep 22, 2015   #3
A proverb said do not judge a book by its cover.

Some IELTS students prefer dealing with a maxim. Yet, unfortunately, a maxim or proverb is categorized as vague phrases in IELTS. Why ? This is because the vague language brings no clarity. You are tested to use very clear language to show that you have a great argument. Here is my sample; Clothes are a prosperous symbol. As such, there seems to be a lot of debate about how dress introduces personality. Some people try to maintain their performance by wearing attractive and stylish clothes. Yet, I think that measuring people by what they wear is false belief .
aseprudi 20 / 29 16  
Sep 22, 2015   #4
Hallo Abraham, I will offer you some suggestion regarding your essay, particularly on the first body.

This part of your essay is good, however it would probably better on condition that you incorporate a real fact or example on this part.

At the first glance, Putting on a luxurious dress determines the living standard of the people. Clothes dressed is absolutely expensive and only the rich who have a high social status can afford it. As seen, like celebrities, they always get all dolled up in a wide range of event in order to attract every single eye surrounded them. What they wear, certainly, figures out their status in social level . Take Katy Perry as an example who normally wears a high quality clothes when she performs in front of the stage. In order to obtain a great deal of public attention, she always appears by using a luxurious dress. What she wears, definitely, points out her status in social level. As a result, strata of society can be seen the way of what they wear. If individuals put on a luxurious wear, it means they are the richest.

Let me give you some suggestion:


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