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There are some common factors we all share to gain happiness; each have own definition of happy life

ningo 22 / 53 9  
Oct 12, 2014   #1
IELTS: Happiness is considered very important in life. Why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness?
It's true that majority of people wish to lead happy lives. While the term of happiness difficult to define for it means different things to different people, all of us share some common needs with regard to experiencing happiness.

To open with, happiness can be identified differently depending on different individuals. Some people see money as a source of happiness; others find their excitement through hobbies, sports and games. Many other get happiness from something deeper. They enjoy spending time with families and friends or simply do something which is helpful for their lives and others'. In general, these changeable feeling of happiness is the reason why we can't easily define what happiness is.

Even it's is a challenging task to identify happiness, we all share some experiences to gain that feeling of leisure and enjoyment. Firstly, our basic survival demands have to be met to lead a pleasant life. It means we need to have a safe place to live, enough food to eat and our children will be sent to school. Secondly, it's about how we manage to get the shared experience with families and friends. The more we keep the good relationship to others, the happier we are.

To conclude, each individual has their own definition of happiness; however, it's the fact that there are some common factors we all share to gain happy lives.

(This essay is built from some suggests from Ielts-Simon)

vangiespen - / 4,137 1449  
Oct 12, 2014   #2
Ni ngo, you need to develop this essay further. It presents good arguments but lacks paragraph development through the presentation of examples of factual evidence. the introduction alone is weak because it does not present the information that is normally expected in an introduction. This includes the restated essay prompt, your opinion, and what the discussion will take place within the essay.

You need to offer a simple definition of happiness at the very least, prior to discussing the meaning of the word in the lives of different people. Even then, your paragraph does not clearly define an individualized understanding of happiness. Instead, you present methods by which happiness can be identified. That is not the same as a definition. Improve your first paragraph by presenting that definition first.

There is also no sign of your discussion regarding the factors that are important in achieving happiness. You can mention at least two of these factors for consideration in order to create the discussion. One reason can discuss, in a complete paragraph, how contentment is an integral factor to consider in the achievement of happiness. Once a person is content with his life, then he is happy. You can also mention self-fulfillment as another factor to consider. A self - fulfilled person will find himself quite happy because he has no wants or needs left to achieve, thus offering him happiness in his life.

If you present the additional information as I detailed it here, you will be able to write a better developed conclusion to the essay.

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