My mom and dad are both great parents, but I prefer my mom more than my dad.
Ahhh!! That is harsh. Parents are people, too. How would you like to have your mom say she prefers your sister over you!? You do not have to choose a preference. It's not all about you. Don't let your dad see the first draft of this essay! :) Also, why don't you get a part time job to help pay for your books, so that your mom does not have to work overtime?
As a compare/contrast essay, this is supposed to show similarities and differences, but right now you show only differences. Oops, I take that back; I see that you do cover similarities.
"Mindset" is one word.Such complication
isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it just shows how different people are.
How are you able to judge your dad as immature when he is so much older than you? You say that he thinks you just want to go party and shirk your responsibilities, and that he has good intentions for you. It sounds like he is the one who is tough on you, and your mom is the one who is more permissive. Naturally, you prefer the one who is permissive.
Please don't be offended; my job is to give my reaction to the essay, so that you know how it affects the reader. Now that I finished reading the essay, I realize that your dad might be so emotionally abusive and negligent that this essay is appropriately harsh. If that is the case, though, and you want to give such a harsh critique of your dad, I think it is important to back up those claims with evidence (for credibility). However, it is NOT necessary for you to focus the essay on your opinions of him or her; rather, focus on similarities and differences.
I have seen compare/contrast essays that give a point by point comparison, and I have seen compare/contrast essays that describe one of the things and then the other. Yours gives one para to differences and one to similarities, and that seems cool, too. I just think you should come to a better conclusion than just to say that you prefer one to the other. In fact, in your conclusion para, you do not even say that. Your whole last sentence should be cut out, because it does not make sense or relate to the comparison in the essay.
Draw a conclusion based on the dynamic teamwork of these two very different personalities.