Writing Task IELTS - complain from tourist regarding holidays on the Fairmont Island

The given pie charts show information from a survey which is filled out by tourists regarding drawbacks and positive sides of Fairmont Island. It is important to note that the most usual pros is friendly people, while according visitors the most unpleasant is the cost that must spend for accommodation.

To begin with, welcoming residents becomes common reason why people want to visiting Fairmont Island. Additionally, It track almost four in ten choicer and get position on the top as the most usual advantages. Moreover, in the second place followed by landscape view with value more than a third while, the rest of proportion is only a significant minority.

Equally important, both of the price for stay and recreation places get complain from tourist as the usual advantages with the score almost a half and less than a third respectively. Than, traveler which visiting that area not really keen on climate condition in that place, as a result it has percentage a fifth. Furthermore, there is 5 % visitor argue the taste of food is not quite good, hence it become one reason why tourist that make this island as their destination should think twice.

Hi Putra

This writing is good to grammar. If you attach picture of the chat about Fairmont Island, I can give you few suggestions. I do know information detailed about Fairmont Island.

Overall, Good Job..

The given pie charts show information from a survey which is filled out by tourists regarding drawbacks and positive sides of Fairmont Island. It is important to note that the most usual pros is friendly people, while according visitors the most unpleasant is the cost that must spend for accommodation.

I give you alternative to make paraphrase:
A survey of aspects of Fairmont Island that tourists enjoy the most and the least is displayed in the pie charts. (This is passive form, you try to make a difference)

I closely read your writing and found that you do not describe data specific at body paragraph. You should write detailed data, and write interesting trend at overview in the first paragraph.