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Composition of NCE Lesson 19 good deal of fortune


Flying Cat 1 / -  
Jun 17, 2020   #1

Mr. Brand & Mrs. Ramsay



In a bar one night, Mr. Brand was talking to a workman who told him that the woman sat on the couch, Mrs. Ramsay had Possessed a good deal of fortune. The workman added that Mrs. Ramsay had lived together with her cat in a flat and would often stay at home with her precious pet. Everyday Mr. Brand stood outside Mrs. Ramsay's and was always observing the cat, as the cat usually left and came back the flat at the same time, Mr. Brand found that it had regular habits. He also found out as much as he could about Mrs. Ramsay and leant that the cat meant a lot to her and she would wiling to pay a considerable ransom if the cat was kidnaped.

One evening, as the cat was leaving the block of flats Mr. Brand was waiting in a corner and all of sudden pounced on the cat. The cat turned out to be caught in a cage. He took the cat to his underground garage and kept it 'safe'. During the next three days, he walked past Mrs. Ramsay's flat on several occasions and noticed that she got very anxious about the cat's disappearance. Now that he was sure the plan was going to succeed so he wrote a letter in which included all his demands.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 14,767 4772  
Jun 17, 2020   #2
Please remember to provide the writing instructions for your essay next time. It will be difficult for me to provide you with a proper review without knowing what the expectations are for your writing. You should consider that I am here to help you improve your writing skills, but you need to give me the instruments to be able to do that. All I need are the writing instructions to be able to do my job more effectively. I look forward to reading the instructions for your writing exercise next time.

I have to say, the story is interesting but without a proper conclusion. I am not sure why it happened that way. While the second half of the story if gripping in a simple manner, the first part lacks in story development. You properly threshed out the character of Mrs. Ramsay, but you failed to properly develop the character background of Mr. Brand and why he would be interested in kidnapping the cat. Additionally, why would the workman be all too knowing about Mrs. Ramsay? How is he related to the worker? What was the motive for the kidnapping aside from a ransom? There are still too many plot and character development points that need to be addressed in the story telling. Right now, it is a draft that needs a lot of work.


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