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Computer is useful tool - has many functions


autumnwave 11 / 35  
Dec 26, 2009   #1
Please read it and help me revise the mistakes in my essay
Computer has many functions which collect of function of radio, television, book, paper and pen...Therefore; nowadays computer becomes useful tool, especially for learning.
With connecting internet, computer could completely take place of radio, television, magazine, newspaper, book, paper and pen. Using computer has many benefits. Instead of buying all they need such as radio, television, book and so on, we only need computer which is enough. Because a heap of books also difficult to replace one computer. T.V and radio are convenient for life but they act in accordance with broadcast station. So, they are hard to comfort us whenever we want. Magazine, newspaper and book are familiar with us. Sometimes, we need to read one of the old articles in them but it's difficult to find out the one we want in massive storage. Moreover, they are easy to decay and turn into dirt and make harmful for our health. While you could find out everything in internet. We only need to know the way how to search all we want. On the other hand, computer is reliable. They could help us save document effectively and help us find document easily with the search tool. Beside, computer could help us check grammar and spelling. And we could learn everything from internet such as cultivating, cooking, make-up... Especially in learning foreigner language, computer is an effective tool. With computer connecting World Wide Web, I could chat with foreigner, watch video clip, and listen music in the new language. Essay forum is an example. With essay forum, we could improve English with members of its. It's very useful.

Computer could be in comparison with teacher but it couldn't replace for teacher. Because without teacher, nobody could instruct us to use computer. Teacher is the one could stimulate our curiosity and craving for knowledge. Teacher show us how to study effectively and convey their experience to us. And the most important is teacher who is always willing helping us explain what you don't understand.

In short, we could speak that computer is one of the most useful things in our life and it doesn't make sense for computer to compare with people.
Keng 39 / 134  
Dec 27, 2009   #2
Your piece of wriitng looka like an abstract for a thesis.

Do you have to write a research paper?

Your overall grammar is acceptable. But you have to use complex, compound, simple sentences alternately.

Here are my suggestions
OP autumnwave 11 / 35  
Dec 28, 2009   #3
Keng
Thank you Keng so much!
I still remember that you instruct me how to post essay into essay forum. From that day on, I always try to write English and post into forum to receive your comments.

I know that I'm bad at English, therefore I must try more and more. I'm not afraid of people laugh at me. It's essential that I could improve my English from your comments :-)

Have a good time!


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