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Constructing a high skyscraper or improving schools and hospitals is more essential for metropoly?


Iforsa 35 / 54 5  
Aug 23, 2016   #1
Topic :

Some people think that large, impresive buildings are important for a city. Others believe that the money should spent on improving schools and hospitals. Disscuss both these views an give your own opinion.

Some people think that construct a high skyscraper is essential for metropolis. Others argue that the authority must focus on allocate their money for rectifying schools and hospitals. I strongly believe that schools and hospitals are more crucial than attractive building as it brings prosperity for society.

Some countries tend to build up an impressive construction to attract overseas travelers. A high skyscraper is used as a tourism place by plenty of cities such as London, Dubai, and New York. These cities prove successfully that attractive buildings have direct correlation with economic growth. For instance, Sadiq Khan as London mayor used their building assets to make a powerful message which is called as 'London is open' to attract a great number of people invest their money in this city.

However, in my view, improving schools and hospital more pivotal since society need better educations and easy health access to get better life. Education is a bridge to earn a wide range of knowledge so that people can broaden their horizon. Health, on the other hand, is represented as the power of movement to implement their idea or their knowledge. People need these elements to optimize their life. Build up schools and hospitals must be the top priority of the government plans so that education and health access work properly. For example, Scandinavia uses 25 per cent of inhabitant income to improve education and health access. Resident of Scandinavia reported how the quality of their life increased significantly due to free education and health access.

To sum up, despite the fact that an attractive construction give advantage to increase economic growth, improving schools and hospital are more crucial to earn better life.

NinaJoesuf25 36 / 66 4  
Aug 24, 2016   #2
Hi Iforsa,
Here's my suggestion for you

Some people think that construct a high skyscraper is essential for metropolis. .

Establishing an imposing building plays an important role in city's development. While it is thoroughly acceptable as the idea of this brings many considerable advantages, I would argue that school and hospital can be more essential since it takes a issue of social welfare into consideration.
ekalamarsyari11 72 / 108 9  
Aug 24, 2016   #3
Some people think that constructing a high skyscraper is ...

....focus on allocate allocating their money for rectifying ...

... more crucial than attractive buildings ....
you should compare similar things

improving schools and hospitals
you also have to use 'and' to equal things

society needs better educations..

Education is a bridgeto earn a wide range of knowledge
it's better to explain 'bridge' in a sub clause

Build up schools and hospitals must be the top priority
you use double verbs in this sentence
Building up schools and hospitals must be the top priority
Fadhilahumar91 61 / 73 6  
Aug 24, 2016   #4
hi...

Others argue that the authority must focus on ...
However, in my view, improving schools ......
need better educations and easy health access to get better life.
can broaden their horizon. Health, on the other hand, is (i think your sentence is jumping in this part)
... top priority of the government plans, so that education and ...

... give advantage to increase economicgrowth, but improvingschools and hospital are ...
( i think you must give conjunction but because you mention in the first paragraf if hospital and school more crucial than skyscraper

thank you


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