Hi
Someone please review and comment on it
Some people think they have right to use as much fresh water as they want，others，otherwise believes governments should strictly control the use of fresh water as it is limited resource. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In the recent years, world has noticed significant changes in climate. The global warming results an increased temperature all over the world. During this, many debates are going on about the usage of fresh water. While some people think that we have the right to use as much fresh water as we want, others argue that governments should restrict the consumption of fresh water. Therefore, it is quite effortful for me to take an apt and immaculate stand before analyze both views carefully.
Naturally, water is one of our basic needs which should not be restricted at any circumstances. Every person has the right to fulfill his basic needs. Additionally, drinking plenty of water is one of the ways to make ourselves healthy. Therefore, a group of people have a view that every person must be allowed to use as much water as they want.
However, governments should not permit to misuse the fresh water such as watering garden and washing car. This over consumption of fresh water will reduce the availability of drinking water. In addition, the global warming has decreased the availability of water all over the world. For instance, people started to pay for fresh water everywhere, even in restaurants. Hence, the governments must pass policies to restrict the water consumption.
In conclusion, I ultimately incline to believe that governments must act wisely and control the usage of fresh water, thereby make sure that the future generation has enough resources. Every people must have the responsibility to obey the restrictions and manage the consumption of water.
During this, many debates are going on about the usage of fresh water
During what? Or did you mean "Due to this" ?
In the recent years, world has noticed significant changes in climate. The global warming results an increased temperature all over the world. During this, many debates are going on about the usage of fresh water.
The first two sentences do not talk anything about fresh water and you suddenly introduce the argument. You need to arrange a logical flow in your writing and each sentence need to have a proper link with the next one.
