'county tournament' - narrative in which you describe a meaningful event, experience

My name is Alex Grey and one of the most monumental achievements in my academic career so far was in elementary school. When i was in 5th grade my teacher first told me about the schools Academic Games team. School had always been a competition in my mind as I was always trying to be the first one done with my work and get the best grades out of everyone. When i heard there really was a competition I was immediately intrigued.

The first set back happened when i found out my teacher told me about the club after the tryouts had already happened. The tryouts for the team consisted of a test. Everyone that wanted to try out had to take this test and who ever got the highest scores was put on the team. I went to the teacher who was in charge of the team and begged her for days to let me take the test late. At first she said absolutely not and that the team was already chosen. After about five days of begging her she came into one of my classes and called me outside. She told me that someone had dropped out of the team and she had to pick another person to join. She said she would give me a chance to take the test during lunch and be placed in the pile with the rest of the people who had taken the test but didn't make it. There were about 10 people who tried out and didn't make it so she told me i had to score higher than all of them on the test to replace the person who had dropped out. I took the test and scored higher than all other 10 people. Thats how i became the last member of the Independence middle School academic games team.

The next part of this story takes place at the county tournament. The first tournament was a math game called "equations". Every school from around the county brought about 5 students to represent their school. All of the kids would be split into tables of 3 to play the game. The tournament goes for 8 weeks and I play one day each week. I would play about 5 games one day a week and every week your score was added up to a cumulative total. The tables would go from rank 1 table with the kids having the highest cumulative score to the last rank table which had the kids with the lowest score. Most of the tournament is a blur to me however, what i will remember for the rest of my life is that the last day of the tournament. I went to the big board to see which table i was playing on first and there was my name on the first ranked table. I went to the table and i was playing a game with the overall first place student in the county. I beat him. He received second place that night only because i broke his undefeated record. At the awards ceremony i was proud that i beat the person who was before undefeated but i had not even been checking the standings for myself. I hear the announcer saying "11th place goes to.... 10th place goes to.... Alright now everyone who gets the award for 9th place and better is invited to the state tournament to represent all of palm beach county." "6th place goes to Alex Grey" was the next thing i heard. I went to states that summer and did not place but had an absolutely amazing time.

The reason i am sharing this story is because it shows my perseverance. I never gave up to get on the team and even though i missed the entire tryouts i still managed to find a way. Not only that but it also should show my passion for learning. Ever since 5th grade "Equations" tournament i have had an absolute passion for math. This led me to taking and trying my hardest in the highest level math courses i could take throughout my entire academic life. That competition gave me the reason to take and pass the AP calculus exam as a junior and continue to Calculus 2 my senior year.

I can suggest some changes that you may want to make.

My name is Alex Grey.andO ne of themy most monumental achievements induring my academic career so fareducation was in elementary school. WhenI was in 5th grade when my teacher first told me about the school's Academic Games team.

In my mind, s chool had always been a competition,in my mind as I was always trying to be the first one done with my work and get the best grades.out of everyone.I was immediately intrigued w hen i heard there reallytruly was a competition.I was immediately intrigued.

The first set back happened when i found out my teacher told me about the club after the tryouts had already happened.
Can you transition better from the previous paragraph? Lead in to this paragraph with another sentence like: "I experienced many setbacks when I attempted to join the competition."

The next part of this story takes place at the county tournament.
I think that you should just take a look at a description of exactly what a narrative is... I think you are not supposed to tell it exactly like a story, but lay out the events as if it is coming from your internal thoughts and experiences. Usually, include a bit of dialogue and imagery. I think with that in mind, you could revise it a little, to make it sound more like a true narrative.

Jennyflower81
thanks alot