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The criminality is continuously growing and threaten societies.


fauziyahtami 22 / 38 6  
Oct 28, 2016   #1
Each year, the crime rate increases.
What are the causes of crime and what could be done to prevent this rise in criminal activity?


Criminality cases have been ascending over the time. Several reasons are engaged to this problem. I do believe that there is any way to root out crime rate. This essay will explain the causes and the prevention of crime.

In this modern day, people are facilitated by sophisticated technology. Firstly, individuals can access information from where they stand using the internet. This amenity is oftentimes being misused by cyber criminals to commit fraud. They can stalk the activity of potential target and track the location using social media. Secondly, people nowadays have a higher IQ in the history; they find many methods to do offence to look for profit. For instance, nowadays, several hypnotherapists are abusing their ability to deceive to reach profits in an easy way. Thirdly, society's life getting harder over the last decades, economic problem force people to seeking money in illegitimate ways. The price of primary needs has been increasing to be an unreasonable price.

People from all over the world cooperate to against wickedness. Various kinds of way have been created using a combination of technologies. The government has a duty to protect the citizen from the threat of the felon. Ministry of national security has to upgrade the security system by utilising technology. For instance, in the last 2015, Jakarta authority installed over 50 units CCTV around the main street. Consequently, the number of crime rate has been decreasing, criminal be more scared to do robber since all of the society has been watching by police. In addition, society has to be more careful during using the internet,

To sum up, in this present time criminality is continuously growing and threaten society. Many factors that cause this case and also many strategies have been developing to inhibit crime. Even though the government has been attempting to protect citizen by setting up a tight security system, society still forced to preserve their self.

sasariri 17 / 25  
Oct 28, 2016   #2
Hi Fauziyhtami..

CriminalityCriminal cases have been ...

Secondly, people nowadaysyou can change it to avoid repetation have a higher IQ ...
For instance, nowadays , several hypnotherapists are ...

Good Job..
Cachaaaaaaaa 28 / 38 3  
Oct 30, 2016   #3
Hi Fauziyah Tami
Here some suggestions for your writing

they stand using the internet (You don't need to use THE in internet since internet is the only one in this world, so it had been a clear object without the)

economic problem forces people to seeking money

... during using the internet,full stop here, not comma

Best Wishes
AK354 7 / 8 1  
Nov 30, 2016   #4
Dear, Fauzi

This is my advice for you, hope it can help you. feel free to correction me too.

SeveralNumerous reasons are engaged to this problem. >> is better
- Please you must write 250 words or more.
- using more less common vocabulary (idioms is better)
- keep on topic, >> not out off topic


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