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Cutting-edge surveillance technology is beneficial for public safety

angga93 42 / 74 20  
Apr 7, 2016   #1
Nowadays technology is increasingly being used to monitor what people are saying and doing (for example, through cell phone tracking and security cameras). In many cases, the people being monitored are unaware that this is happening.

• Do you think the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?
• Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Rapid development of surveillance technology makes it easier to monitor people's activity. Considerable number of monitoring devices are intentionally utilized without people awareness nowadays. It is true that this case has several disadvantages in people's lives, but I firmly believe that it brings more benefits, especially in public safety.

Silent surveillance is unpleasant for some people as it makes them lose their privacy. Because of ubiquitous CCTV and tracking devices, societies experience discomfort since they feel that their personal lives are deeply observed by others. Related to this, I have an experience of choosing private items in a supermarket. The presence of hidden cameras made me uncomfortable when choosing feminine hygiene products so that I ended up buying random items which I found unsatisfying. Apart from that, the convenience offered by monitoring devices will eventually make police officers lose their basic skills for solving crimes. It is because they rarely use their tracking and identifying skills to find crime offenders and rely this stages on modern surveillance technology.

On the other hand, I believe that public monitoring equipment is beneficial for public safety. First of all, it will effectively decrease crime rate as crime offenders concern about hidden cameras that automatically record their action. Thus, criminals will think twice when they want to do harmful action. In addition, camera and tracking equipment are extremely useful in crime measurement. Recorded CCTV videos act as evidence so that the offenders cannot avoid punishment by confuting their accusation. Tracking devices also very helpful to locate the criminals so that police will spend less time to find them. Not only that, it also useful to find missing people so that they can be found quickly and send back to their family.

To conclude, it is clear that cutting-edge surveillance technology has more benefits than its drawbacks. I totaly believe that it offers better public safety although sometimes it causes discomfort for some people. In my view, surveillance devices is better to be hidden in order to prevent destruction by bad people.

ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
Apr 7, 2016   #2
Angga, I notice many improvements of your writing in compare to previous essays, particularly in terms of your essay-organization. The idea that you deliver is also very informative and clear. Yet, you still need more improvements in your grammar, especially when it comes to singular and plural issues, and you still make one mistake about your spelling, which I think it is unnecessary if you are more aware about that. Another suggestion for you is that, you need to state clearly that "the benefits are able to outweigh the drawbacks" to avoid misleading, because examiner is not a mind-reader. Lastly, for a detailed corrections of your grammatical issues, with corrections applied.

Considerable number of monitoring devices are

Considerable number of monitoring devices is / considerable numbers of monitoring devices are

this stages

these stages

rely this stages on modern

rely on the stage of modern...

Tracking devices also very helpful to locate the criminals so that

Tracking devices are also extremely helpful to locate the criminals, so the police...

found quicklyand send back to their family.

unnecessary additional information, because your previous sentence is already clear.

surveillance devices is better

surveillance devices are better...

spelling error:



As you can see, I hope this is fruitful towards your development in the future essays.

Keep writing and good luck! :)

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