Unanswered [2] | Urgent [0]

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 2

Cyber-bullying occurs when one party harasses another on-line

pacers7ind 11 / 25 2  
Jun 22, 2013   #1
This is my first draft, please let me know if there are any organization, structure, evidence, or argument errors. Thank you
Why is it important to work to delete cyberbullying?

Cyberbullying occurs when one party harasses or threatens another party online. It can be a potential threat because the person doing the harm has very little risk of facing repercussions, the victim, however, receives all the harm. It is necessary to work towards stopping cyber bullying because it only affects the victims and this can lead to psychological problems; actions must be taken.

Some may argue that cyber bullying is simply a sensitivity issue, however, although they may be correct to some degree, there are cases where the victim faces unreasonable bullying. For example, a cyber bully can threaten to kill and track down someone he may have been fighting with in a forum. It is only reasonable for any person to see a death threat as credible due to the high risk involved. Whether credible or not, death threats should not be made online because it only makes the victim think he or she will be harmed. This can potentially lead to psychological damages. As a result, there will be people in society who have been psychologically harmed and this could lead to a lack of self esteem throughout their lives.

Cyber bullying is a very ambiguous term because it can be defined even in the simplest events. For example, an online gamer speaking through a headset can simply use profanity to offend a young gamer whom was on his headset as well. Although the majority of adults wont be offended, we are uncertain what age group we may be interacting with online. Also, everyone reacts differently to certain words. For example, some people may find racial slurs as comedic while others may find them offensive. As a result, using words that some may find appropriate may harm others. This uncertainty can cause one to blindly offend someone. As a result, people need to refrain from using words that the majority of the people would find inappropriate.

It is unreasonable to resort to censorship and restrictions to stop cyber bullying because there is no definite characteristics that help detect a cyber bully simply through their online activity. As a result, it is important to work towards education people on the dangers of cyber bullying. One way to accomplish this would be for each state to declare a statewide cyber bully awareness day. This would, at the very least, instill the thoughts of cyber bullying in the minds of those who hear about it. Also, elementary school kids could also be taught the negative effects of cyber bullying through workshops. Last, large social networks hold some degree of obligation to alerting their users that their services can be abused to harm others. Doing this would help perpetuate the thoughts of cyber bullying through society and ultimately make them revise their intended negative acts online.
jkjeremy - / 380 72  
Jun 22, 2013   #2
For the most part I like this. If only there were fewer instances of the words "cyber" and "bullying," it would be even stronger.

Is this for a test?

Really what I'm asking for are more detailed directions you were asked to follow when writing this essay.

Home / Writing Feedback / Cyber-bullying occurs when one party harasses another on-line