Unanswered [12] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 3

Dangerous Minds Assignment Paragraph Writing; vivid deep movie as a grade 11 poetry unit startup.


Geist 4 / 3  
Apr 29, 2008   #1
Describe six images that reflect the background of the characters in this film as depicted in the opening credits.

What better way is to start a grade 11 poetry unit you may ask? Mr. Raible, our beloved English teacher, kick-starts it by introducing to what may seem a vivid deep movie called Dangerous Minds. Enthralled by the black and white intro was full of artistic sequences, and meaningful images that described the sad and hopeless society of the projects easily.

The first image we are introduced too is the camera zoom out of graffiti in a may seem unsanitary room stating in bold letters "love u baby". Essentially, what this image is striving to convey is there was no respect for property. This general image can also bring into consideration the fact that it is a lousy neighbourhood and there are people who have a certain tag to their graffiti style and even the neighbourhood isn't that much prioritized by the law enforcement.

The next image we come across is the tipped over stop sign on a near by road. Although this picture is without words, it clearly crosses out the message once again that there is no respect for priority and the society is a poor one for the unprioritization of not replacing the stop sign. In a rare case possibly someone accidentally crashed into the stop sign, but that doesn't really add to the artistic value of the introduction so we will let that slide. Then, the next depressing image we see is the window of a house being spray painted black once again proving that properties aren't respected and the hooligans are obviously roaming the streets untouched by law enforcement.

Also, we see a shrine with pictures and flowers indicating someone's death, however it was not near a street so rules out possible vehicle accident and therefore concludes a gang oriented death. After we see the homeless guy pass in front of the project school girls thus does it not only proves this society being poor but it also brings foreshadowing. The foreshadowing it displays is that the girl's future is not that different of the currently lifestyle of the homeless guy. Last significant image we see is the drug dealing on the street once again proving that the law enforcement in the following society is rather weak and crime rate is undoubtedly high.

Finally, the artistic sequence that was done perfectly well was the smooth roll over of the black and white introduction to color when the bus was carrying the project students of the poor and corrupt society to the rich neighbourhood school signifying a more positive change in society. Though this intro of the movie Beautiful Minds may have been 3 minutes or so and without narration nor words it did however convey with utmost clarity the surrounding of the characters as vivid as possible.

Though this is supposed to be a paragraph of 150 words I believe I have exceeded that being a good or bad thing. Please take a look at my paragraph by proofreading and pinpoint my mistakes if possible by all means show enhance my piece of writing.

Thank you.

EF_Team5 - / 1,586  
Apr 29, 2008   #2
Good morning!

This is a very good essay; it is organized, with clear supporting details. Exceeding the word count could go either way; you know your instructor best, and that is really the most appropriate indicator. I don't think he will mind if you are using the extra words constructively, which you definately are. If you really want to cut down on the words, you could remove a couple of examples, shortening it nicely.

There are just a couple spelling/grammatical/punctuation errors.

"As we see the homeless guy pass in front of the project school girls thus does it not only proves this society being poor but it also brings foreshadowing."

This sentence is a little awkward. How about reworking it to read something such as, "We next see a homeless guy pass in front of the project schoolgirls. This not only proves this society is poor but it also exhibits foreshadowing.

"...without narration nor words..."
This sounds a littel redundant. Perhaps change it to "without narration or written words"...
Your conclusion ties everything up nicely. Good work!
OP Geist 4 / 3  
May 4, 2008   #3
Dangerous Minds Movie character comparison

Film Focus #2: Character Connections: Write a 50-75 wd paragraph on the main characters in the film. Make a connection between that character and a "real" character in your life. Louanne, Griffith, Mr. Grandey, Carla Nichols, Raul, Emilio, Callie, Durrell, Angela are the characters.

Dangerous Minds is a phenomenal movie from 1995 that displays a huge variety of characters trying to put up with the poor society. Of those fictional characters I am able to make many connections to real people in my life.

To begin with, Louanne Johnson, the protagonist of the movie is very similar to my mom. They both have astonishing similarities like they both being teachers of high school and their dislike for lazy students. Furthermore in addition they are determined to keep their students at the very edge in order to be successful; something that most teachers aren't paid to do.

In the second place noticeable connection that can be made is the history teacher Griffith and my English teacher Mr. Raible. They have a positive attitude every day and also have a friendly characteristic that allows you to sort out your problems. In fact it is found that they both have an uncanny sense of humour.

Next accurate comparison that can be made is principle Mr. Grandey and Handsworth Secondary School Vice Principle Mr. Hasenauer. They both seem very serious and therefore indicative of a past depressive life. Besides of the cold front they share they both are not helpful and obviously not a person to turn to with school issues.

Another distinguishable correlation can be made between Carla Nichols and the secretary of Handsworth Secondary School. They both seem too be busy to be of any help and if they have time their help is rendered useless. By contrast the secretary of Dangerous Minds however was close minded for instance it was her opinion of sending Callie out of school to a different school equipped to her pregnant needs and Callie was simply given no say to the outcome of the choice.

In addition to the list of exquisite comparisons underlies another connection between Raul and my friend Kyle. They both are somewhat class like clowns and they don't think before they speak. Also they both don't think rationally and don't see the big picture. The similarity however ends there as Raul is defensive about his honour when my friend doesn't retaliate to insults.

Moreover a deeper connection can be established between Emilio and my cousin Iman from Switzerland. They both are around the same age and they both display male macho-like dominance. They are considered to be handsome and strong fighters. The similarities end there as Emilio pick fights in contrast to my cousin who avoids them.

Also there is a strong resemblance between Callie and my friend Michael. They both are intelligent academically and they are ahead of the class. With this in mind they however lack street-smart and most often make stupid mistakes. Above all they both are very close-minded and consequently show as to why they make mistakes.

Yet another alikeness can be seen this time being between Durrell and my friend Armin. They both were doing poorly academically and an A grade to them to this day still is very rare. They also take the spot light of being class clown throwing out jokes the class as whole can laugh too.

Finally the last character comparison that can not be achieved is Angela. I have yet to find such a character in my life that has somewhat similar characteristics and since her character was not given too much of a spot light it is hard to determine more of her traits.

To conclude, there are many characters in my life that have similar traits and characteristics of those fictionalized in the movie, Dangerous Minds, thus being indicative that the script of the movie has done its job of providing realistic like characters with the exception of Angela.

Please proofread my essay and pinpoint freely any mistakes be it gramatical, etc and free free to show me an alternative way to cross out my message in other words change it at your will :).

Thank you.


Home / Writing Feedback / Dangerous Minds Assignment Paragraph Writing; vivid deep movie as a grade 11 poetry unit startup.