You have posted your essay about advertisement in my thread but while i was writing my comments to help you you had already deleted your the essay there.
I think that probably my recommendation and corrections would be helpful somehow. But i do not know how to send them to you and i am posting them here.
Some people think it is leading them in a wrong way
which that encourages us to buy things which we really do not need.
I strongly agree it makes our life
will be happier and improved.
So, I will for more detailed information about it.
But others think it is a way of getting information about new products in the market which improves our lives. I strongly agree it makes our life will be happier and improved .
it is better to avoid repeating. how about these? "which benefit our lives" or "it make our lives happier and easier" or "it makes our lives better and comfortable"
I think that conclusion is too short. I guess it must be three sentences.
you wrote there: "advertisement is ...the information desk,..." then "people know..." , and it is correct and you sum up the advertisement's benefits in general, overall and logically you have to say something like "I believe..." or "from my opinion..". You should restate or emphasize your personal viewpoint again.