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Definition of heroes - Gandhi, Luther King, Lincoln essay

rishav25 1 / 1  
May 29, 2012   #1
can someone plz rate my essay on a scale of 1-12...
Prompt - "Should heroes be defined as people who say what they think when we ourselves lack the courage to say it? "

Often people consider heroes as people who protect people, but actually heroes are people who say things they think when other people lack the courage to say it. The life of Mahatma Gandhi, the fight against racism by Martin Luther King Jr. and the political leadership of Abraham Lincoln elucidate this fact.

Mahatma Gandhi's whole life was characterized by non-violent means of freedom struggle. Born in a small village in India, he later came to be know as 'Father of Modern India'. The intrepid old man used non-violent resilience to drive away the British from his country. He stood for the people when the latter lacked the courage to stand for themselves. He believed that his country should get freedom and so did other Indians, but he had the courage to lead from the front. To India, he gave a nation, but to the world he gave the doctrine of 'Non Violence' which is arguably the most important principle of the twenty first century. His life explicitly edifies how a person stood for what he thought was right when other people lacked the courage to do so.

Similar to Gandhi's life, Martin Luther King Jr's fight against racism edifies how a person became a 'Hero' by saying things others lacked the courage to say. Martin Luther dedicated his whole life to fight for 'Equal rights for all'. He played a crucial role to pass the amendment in the a American Constitution which gave African Americans the right to vote. He was articulate orator and in his speeches he said things about 'equality and brotherhood' which other people also believed in but lacked the courage to say. Martin Luther King Jr has become an American hero, and a tribute to him is given to him by a national holiday on every third Monday of January.

In addition to these two heroes, Abraham Lincoln, the 16th president of America's political struggle to protect the Union of States shows how a person becomes a hero by standing for things others cant. Abraham Lincoln fought to protect the Union of States in America, he fought for what he believed was right and what other people lacked the valor to do.

The lives of these three courageous men, explicitly edifies who a true Hero is; one who says things what he thinks when others lack the courage to say it.
chessman567 5 / 170 11  
May 29, 2012   #2
a ten to eleven, probably a 10 perhaps
I graded this according to your use of vocabulary and grammer. Don't try to use the word things in your essay. Also, you have great idea flowing ideas, however, it seems that you used a thesaurus for your essay. Your word choice does not seem to be original, you get what I mean?
OP rishav25 1 / 1  
May 30, 2012   #3
kinda...can you elaborate ? how do i improve my essay to get a 12 ?...I'm giving the SAT in 2 days...any last minute suggestions or tips ?
chessman567 5 / 170 11  
May 30, 2012   #4
go to this website it will help articulate


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