Writing task 1: Describe the process of geothermal electricity production

Please give me detailed score for this essay. Thanks!

geothermal power plant For electricity

The diagram below shows how geothermal energy is used to produce electricity. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

My answer:

The diagram illustrates the process of geothermal power plant taking advantage of subterranean heat to generate electricity. Generally, the electricity manufacturing comprises a total of 5 procedural steps. Each of them will be specifically stated and compared whenever possible regarding from the cold water input to the electricity outcome as follows.

Overall, there are five stages in the process, beginning with the cold water pumping down to the well farther underground. What proceeds is the fluid is injected into the geothermal basin, next into the production wells and pumped up to the condenser. The final course is that the output from the condenser operates turbine and generator for electricity production.

Taking a look at the first three stages of the process, there are two wells drilled at the same depth of 4.5 kilometres that allow water on the surface to access the geothermal zone underground. First, cold water is pumped from a tank on Earth down into the injection well. Second, after entering geothermal strata, cold water permeates hot rocks and absorbs the thermal heat on the way through. Third, the production well receives the scalding hot water and pumped it up into the condenser at 4,5 km above.

The last two steps are carried out on the Earth's surface. Initially, when the geothermal now-heated water enters the condenser, it evaporates and releases some steam through a pipe to the last chamber. In this chamber, the vapour courses into the turbine and powers it to rotate. Sequentially, the generator which is activated by the turbine generates and transmits electricity into the national grid.

• 
  
  

Huyen, you have written too many words for this essay. You need to write between 150-200 words only in order to maintain the quality of your writing. The quality is maintained by being able to proof read your work and correct the errors after writing your draft. Don't expect your first round of writing to be the final one, which is why you wrote so many words. If you don't edit, revise, and proof-read, you will turn in an imperfect, unchecked paper that will allow for multiple scoring deductions on your part. Always use a timer to make sure that you have written within the time limitation and that you have left an ample amount of time with which to edit the paper.

Since this is a Task 1 essay, you do not have to be very wordy in the description. As long as you properly describe the process and you stick to the instructions, you will have a proper restatement of the illustration. With only 20 minutes for this task, you need to make sure that you keep it short for the reasons I mentioned in the previous paragraph. Overall though, this is a good interpretation of the drawing. By the way, don't describe it as a simple diagram, call it an illustrative diagram because it contains worded instructions as well as a drawing of the process.

In the first paragraph, you need a comma to separate the process from the point where the water enters the production wells then pumped into a condenser. You need a comma between the two statements because those are 2 separate but connected instructions.

With regards to the digits indicated int he drawing, I know that you use commas in your country to indicate decimal points. That is not the international standard for writing out these digits. Always stick to the way it is shown in the drawing. That means, you have to say it is 4.5 kilometers instead of 4,5 km. The way you interpret the data has to be interpreted the same way by the reader so do not use localized interpretations. Use the original interpretations for TA purposes.

Your individual scoring is as follows:

TA , 8 - You have done a very good job in describing the 5 step process. You indicated all of the points for reference with an accurate description of the process per step.

C&C , 8 - The paragraphs are well developed in terms of explaining the procedure and you properly collated the information into related presentations, separating the process at the exact points it was also done in the diagram.

LR , 7 _ You have a good grasp of the English language. Most of the terms were properly used in the paragraphs. Any mistakes are negligible and does not impede the understanding of the energy production process.

GRA, 8 - Your sentences are mostly error free and only requires work on the signal words use such as the word "the". Aside from that, the sentences can be easily deciphered / understood by the reader.