Unanswered [0] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 5


Describe two charts about a survey of adult education..from Cambridge IELTs 1


aleafsun 9 / 19  
Jul 27, 2011   #1
Prompt: There are two charts which show the results of a survey of adult education. The first chart shows the reasons why adults decide to study. The pie chart show how people think the costs of adult education should be shared.

There are two relative issues discussed here by two charts - the reasons for people attend continuing education and who is responsible for the cost of it.

To begin with, being interested in subject and gaining qualifications are the top two motives for adults, which are cited by 40% and 38% of adult students, to enroll in further education. Followed by three main reasons-current job as well as promotion will be benefited by adult education, and it is an enjoyable event, each being mentioned by around 20%. Finally, there are 12% of grown-ups who study in their adulthood for being able to change jobs, and only 8% of students who want to meet people.

Turning to the pie chart, it represents who is responsible for the cost of such education. Individuals who attend to those educations should pay the major part of the tuition fees; however, employers are obligated for 35%. Intriguingly, taxpayers need to be in charge of the rest.
Alisha123 9 / 18  
Jul 28, 2011   #2
I have also done this chart. DOnt try to repeat the same wordings from the graph. and mention about highest and lowest percentages.

The introduction is not up th e mark.

Use some connectives.
OP aleafsun 9 / 19  
Jul 28, 2011   #3
Alisha,
Thank you for your reply.
May I ask how you will rephrase as the introduction is concerned?
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,321 129  
Jul 31, 2011   #4
The word relative is the only part that makes it unclear. Usually you would say "relative to [something]"...

A soccer ball is small relative to me, but it is large relative to a spider. To the spider, a soccer ball is very big.

In your introduction, I think a better word to use is RELATED.

:-)
ekekek 25 / 51  
Aug 1, 2011   #5
I think you should balance the description in two charts. Just one sentence about the figure in the second chart seems inbalance in the essay structure.


Home / Writing Feedback / Describe two charts about a survey of adult education..from Cambridge IELTs 1
Writing
Editing Help?
Fill in one of the forms below to get professional help with your assignments:

Graduate Writing / Editing:
GraduateWriter form ◳

Best Essay Service:
CustomPapers form ◳

Excellence in Editing:
Rose Editing ◳

AI-Paper Rewriting:
Robot Rewrite ◳