Topic: A company has announced that it wishes to build a large factory near your
community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence
on your community. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your
position.
A quote by Richard Wilkinson describes economic development as "A development of more intensive ways to exploit the natural environment". Keeping this in mind, I would strictly oppose the develoment of a factory near by my community and provide two significant reasons to support my disapproval.
First, the pollutants released into the atmosphere is harmful to the residents living in my community. The release of poisonous gases such as Methane, Carbon Monoxide, Chlorine through the factory chimney or other outlets will affect the natural surroundings. For instance, no one can forget the disastrous impact of the Bhopal gas tragedy that took place in 1984 where a pesticide plant released poisonous methyl isocyanate gas which claimed the lives of about 500,000 Bhopal resident living in the nearby area. Other effects of release of such a poisonous gas include Jaundice, Typhoid , Chollera and countless others. Although there is no certainity that such an incident is bound to happen immediately after the development of the plant, but one can't mar the self evident truth that it happens in almost all the cases.
Second, consumption of resources such as electricity and water by the factory will affect the nearby communities. For a factory to manufacture products, it needs continuous supply of electricity and water. This will reduce the rate of supply of these resources to the nearby communities. Thus one may observe frequent load shedding and scarcity of water in those areas thereby affecting the residents of these areas.
Thus to sum up, according to me building a factory nearby a residential community or any urban region should strictly be prohibited by law. You can call this as an act against the economic growth of the community but I dont want to see another Bhopal or Chernobyl debacles happenning in my community.
I think it is good. At least better than mine ;)
For a factory to manufacture products, it needs continuous supply of electricity and water.
May be this sentence was better:
A factory needs continuous supply of electricity and water.
It is quite fabulous to quote with someone's words. Especially when it is relevant to the topic.
However, the following suggestion that you may give three supporting paragraph in the independent writing.
consumption of resources such as electricity and water by the factory will affect the nearby communities.
Should it adds "the" in front of the word "consumption"?
By the way, I think your essay is great!
This is your first time in EF, I guess...So, I first wish to request you to post all your TOEFL essays into "Writing Feedback" forum. Also, provide a meaningful topic in the "Subject" field in your future essays. :)
This is very good writing... You follow the right structure; good content; excellent vocabulary.... You surely can aim for a good score.... Only be mindful about the time factor as this task has a major bearing on it.
Good Luck!
Thnx ....and I assure you that I'll post my essay in the writing feedback forum...
But really m nervous about the vocabulary....I have used simple vocab structure in all my essays...
Can you recommend me any resources from where I can learn how to synthesize complex vocab structure into independent essay task????
There are no "resources" that will enable you to do this in a matter of days. None.
It's like asking me to recommend resources where you can learn mathematics.
When are you taking the test?
Can you recommend me any resources from where I can learn how to synthesize complex vocab structure into independent essay task????
Well.... I don't think that you really need to worry about complex vocab structure.... this is a pretty simple task. When I did TOEFL, I had lots of help from this site. Also, this TOEFL official site and you can get an idea how they rate you.
Read others essays to pick points for similar tasks. Practice would help you a lot to improve your writing within allocated time frame. :)
