Effect of rising popularity of online education
In present times, online courses have become famous progressively; some universities have used them as a new approach instead of traditional learning. Some people believe that the development of online courses has brought considerable benefits, while others have an opposite view. In my opinion, I would argue that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
The main drawback of the trend of university online courses is the lack of interaction. Learning online means students not only may not have opportunities to face-to-face contact with teachers in a classroom on a regular basis but also have to rely on automatic content. Furthermore, students will not have a cognitive view of the significance of interaction and rivalry with classmates in an educational environment. For example, whereas students attending traditional classes have interaction with their teachers and peers and even discuss with their classmates about specific issues of the lessons or part of subjects of their assignment, online learners are restricted by the chatting areas or website. As a result, students not only lose their motivation but also become more and more passive in their studies.
Despite Internet-based learning's negative effect, it has significant benefits. First of all, students can access all resources within a traditional course; these courses are with no limitation of time, so learners can watch them over if they do not understand. Besides, the cost of learning will cut down considerably, which means students can save a tremendous amount of money for their living. Finally, the widespread presence of the Internet makes online courses become a positive way for learners regardless of age, gender, local, and backgrounds to approach with a variety of information. For example, some adults who live in rural areas or dropped out of university want to continue their studies, but they have either time or money, an online course will enable them to get a degree whether who they are and where they are from, this was considered to be impossible a few years ago before the Internet was spread widely.
In conclusion, while learning online has some drawbacks, I consider it to be a positive development in the educational system in the future.
"Some people believe..."
To make a concise claim briefly state the reasons. Maybe instead: "Others may believe that online courses have increased stress and workload, however, online learning is extremely useful beacause ______, _____, and ______."
I like the way you develop your idea in the introduction and your first paragraph. You gave summary of all your answer in your introduction so it is very easy to follow. Your first paragraph presented the idea very well with a topic sentence, an explanation and an example. However, in your second paragraph, you gave too many idea. I think it will be better if you state only the most important idea and develop them more. You should also give more detail on why you think the advantage outweigh the disadvantage.
You have some grammar problems:
passive voice "will be cut down"
"are with no limitation of time" better expressed as "have no time limitation"
..."they have neither time nor money"
thank you so much for all your response
1. I really love the way you operate each point with clear examples in the first paragraph
2. in the second paragraph, you put too much ideas in one paragraph and not develop further for each, which may be a minus for your essay. Just focus on specific ideas and develop fully.
Great write up!
1. Your introduction is good enough
2. "Learning online means students not only may not have opportunities to face-to-face contact with teachers in a classroom on a regular basis but also have to rely on automatic content." - this looks too ambigious, i suggest you simplify it.
3. "For example, whereas students attending traditional classes have" - i think you meant to say "where" not "whereas". Kindly see to this.
4. "peers and even discuss with their classmates about specific issues of the lessons or part of subjects of their assignment, online learners are restricted by the chatting areas or website." - i feel there should be " but" immediately after the comma connecting assignment and online learners. - "assignment, but online learners"