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The differences in the arrangements of Woodward University over thirty one years from 1985 until now


Maya29 14 / 18 14  
Apr 17, 2016   #1
The differences in the arrangements of Woodwards University over thirty one years from 1985 until now are illustrated in the map. What stands out from the figure reveals that the amount of infrastructure features has been minimized and replaced by some green public area.

Firstly, there are several major changes to the transport system in the university. The main road along north side of the administration building which connects it to the both of the car parks was demolished and replaced by the footpaths. Following this, the car park in the south west side of the college in 1985 has been changed to shuttle bus terminal. In 2016, a lecture theatre is built taking the place of the car park beside the biology block unit.

The university's building layout has also been different. The library which stood alone in the north-west corner of the college in 1985 has been united with IT center and stretched to the south side therefore it becomes longer than before. Subsequently, the science laboratories block has been constructed to the right of the library and IT center building associating physics, chemistry and biology blocks. It is also clear that the admin building has been rebuilt in front of the lecture theatre which is shorter than the previous one. The university landscape has also been altered where large green areas now stand in place of the buildings.




wahyu 16 / 28 1  
Apr 17, 2016   #2
What app miss Maya your essay is good, i have suggestions to your introduction paragraph.

you could use this pattern :
1. Reserve some of the information, paraphrase and use some synonyms.
2. Overview the information

I hope that my suggestions help.

The differences in the arrangements of Woodwards University over thirty one ...

The picture reveals a comparison of the arrangements of Woodwards University over thirty one years from 1985 until now. Overall it can be seen that the amount of infrastructure features has been minimized, while some buildings replaced by some green public area.
ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
Apr 17, 2016   #3
Maya, composing an IELTS task 1 writing is somewhat challenging, especially when it comes to map or diagram process. Deciding the wrong tenses when starting to write your paragraph will definitely ruin the whole essay. Actually, there are several methods of making map essay, which is related to what I have read from your essay.

Firstly, you have to be able to distinguish the difference between past perfect and present perfect. If you are talking / writing about something which is happened in the past, of course the tenses should be either past perfect or simple past tense. Your essay is somewhat different, the time signal is already clear I guess, you put 'year' there, but why did you use present perfect tense? It is so unfortunate. Secondly, if you list your ideas by saying 'firstly', do not left it hanging there. Therefore, you need to write 'secondly' for your second list. Lastly, it is not suggested to combine two type of tenses if you are not really aware or really sure about it. Remember, clarity is the king. Unclear or confusing sentence will badly damage your final grade. Somehow, simple sentences are still better than 'confusing' complex sentences.

I hope you find my feedback is valuable towards your development in writing. Keep practicing Maya :)


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