railways vs new roads
People have different views about the funding of traffic system. Some people think that governments should pay out money on new roads, but from my perspective, paying more attention to railways is the best way, since it is more beneficial for communities.
There are a variety of reasons why governments should spend much money on the construction of new roads. Some people think that expanding more road system could tackle congested roads. From this, there are existence of multiple roads that help people commute comfortably and save time. For instance, with proper roads, farmers would be able to take a shortcut to transport their goods from farms to the market in a shorter time. Governments choose methods of investing more money into new road, therefore, to deal with traffic congestions.
In spite of these above arguments, several individuals also propose that railway system should be funded by governments. Firstly, rails can carry hundreds of people and several hundred tonnes of goods at the same time. Thus they are more convenient than other transport. Furthermore, many items could be convey in the safest and fastest way because there is no rush over there. Secondly, in modern days, some people are contributing to help the environment abolish pollution such as air contamination by using trains rather than other road transport. Spending money on improving railways, henceforth, is the leading way authorities are concentrating on for the future strategy.
In conclusion, although the fact that there are several reasons for new roads constructions, I firmly believe that railways have more benefits not only for communities, but also for the environment.
Holt Educational Consultant - / 11,567 3753
The extent response is missing in the essay. The degree of (dis) agreement with the statement should have been presented prior to the reasoning topics.The writer neglected to present the required discussion format in the required sentence structure in the first paragraph, weakening the paragraph discussion restatement. Although the proper format was used in the reverse paraphrase, the score increasing function for the response happens in the first paraphrase presentation. The thesis statement however, gave an idea as to the actual opinion of the writer. A more direct approach would be better next time.
The reasoning paragraphs further add to the failure of the presentation to provide clear supporting opinions for the writer's point of new. There should be 2 supporting paragraph presentations . A comparative discussion format is not acceptable in this single opinion essay. scores will be deducted from non-supporting paragraphs. Specifically in the word count section.
The first paragraph seem like repeat the topic without reasons why you choose to expend much more money on railways rather than new roads.
Some people think that expanding more road system could tackle congested roads. From this, there are existence of multiple roads that help people commute comfortably and save time.
You chose to spend money for railways but you didn't tell the clearly reasons.