[TOEFL] What discovery in the last 100 years has been most beneficial for my country

This is my second try on writing.

What discovery in the last 100 years has been most beneficial for people
in your country? Use specific reasons and examples to support your
choice.

For the last 100 years, there are many incredible inventions that has changed our life such as telephone, hi speed car, refrigerator and so on. I personally believe that we all get abundant benefits from inventing of the internet. The internet allow people to share a lot types data in one time, provide a great information and also everyone could easy reach these invention.

To begin with, in my country before the internet exist, we used telephone to communicate with people, we use postal service to send mail, and also we use radio to listen to musics. Then the internet appear, we could share many types of data such as voice, mail, picture and so on by using the internet. We could call people, send e-mail, and listen to musics by using the internet. We also could video call to communicate people by using the internet. It is easier to share many types data by using the internet.

Secondly, the internet provide a plenty of useful information. There are many types of information such as news, medication, engineering, and so on. Everyone gets benefit from using the internet. For instance, students could extend their knowledge from those information, business analysts could gather information from the internet to do a research and could predict a risk in investing and so on. A lot of information help people to do their jobs.

Lastly, nowaday everyone could easy to reach these invention. Not only people that have high income have the internet but everyone also have the internet. Because it is not too expensive and everyone could afford it. Consequently, every get full benefit from the internet.

In my conclusion, we get abundant of benefit from the internet. Because we could share many types of data by using the internet. Moreover, the internet is a source of information that everyone easy to access. Besides, this invention is easy for everyone to reach. The internet is the greatest discovery that everyone get a lot of benefit from it.

you should learn academic word list.

I don't think you should use "invention" instead of "discovery" as they have different meanings. The former means creating something new, while the latter is figuring out something that preexists. The internet is more like an invention to me, rather than a discovery.

... these things have already been invented and hence you need this correction.



Here you need to give a comparison to stay aligned with the prompts;
However, out of all those inventions, I personally feel that internet has been the most beneficial for my people due to several reasons.

Write short sentences.... that helps your sentences become more interesting. Also, give more prominence to your reason. What's the reason here? It is;
To begin with, the Internet brought many advance solutions in the field of communication and entertainment that enhanced our quality of life. ... this is the real reason

Prior to the Internet, telephone and letters were the main modes of communication between people. As communication options, telephone is costlier while letters are pretty slower. However, the Internet offers both highly economical and speedy solutions in contrast to those communication modes.

Thank you for your recommendations.