Topic: As the number of cars increases, more money has to spend on road systems. Some people think that the government should pay for this. Others, however, think that drivers should cover the costs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
investments in road infrastructure
It is obvious that more money is to be spent on transport infrastructure due to an incremental increase in car ownership. While it can be argued that road system should be wholly financed by the government, I am of the opinion that road users should share the responsibility to subsidize road developments.
There are several reasons why the government has to pay for the improvements of road systems. Firstly, improving citizens' living standards is one of the most crucial responsibilities of a government. State authorities need to raise the convenience and safety of commuting by paying for constructing and upgrading, as transportation is a basic need of each individual. Secondly, investments in infrastructure require a huge amount of money that exceeds inhabitants' financial capability. In fact, numerous major highway road constructions are financed by foreign loans, which need government commitment.
On the other hand, car users' shared responsibility to cover road expenditure is not only beneficial to their own convenience but also to the social community as a whole. As the number of car owners takes up a large fraction of road space, they take great advantage of construction and maintenance on roads as they could save time traveling and increase safety. Moreover, a person who can afford a car is often more affluent than other people. Paying for road constructions, thus, is a kind of financial support for less fortunate people so that the whole community will enjoy a better life.
In conclusion, I believe that government and citizens should join hands to increase investments in road infrastructure for the sake of society.Holt Educational Consultant - / 14,835 
4783 Cam, this is an improperly developed essay. You did not properly develop the opening statement, you did not discuss both points of view in the body, and you did not offer a complete discussion of your personal opinion on the matter either. It would appear that the whole essay was solely based on your point of view instead of being a "discuss both views plus personal opinion" essay. The opening statement that you wrote discussed your point of view immediately when that is not required in the opening statement. The point of view is always a part of the body of paragraphs. It is never provided in the outline statement, which is what the purpose of the opening statement is. Having said that, let me give you an idea as to how to approach this essay next time by giving you a sample below:
The number of cars using public roads increase every year. As such, a debate has slowly emerged regarding who should pay for the expenses related to the road systems. Others believe that the private vehicle owners should pay for this, while some, believe that this is the responsibility of the government. In this essay, I will be offering some insight into both points of view as well as my personal opinion on the matter.
The reason that some people believe that the government should pay for the systems is based on...
Those who believe that the private transport owners should pay for the road system explain that...
In my opinion ...
It is therefore safe to conclude that...
The above format is one of the many discussion formats that can be used for this essay. I hope that you will consider using this more proper format when you receive a similar instruction with your upcoming practice tests.
1) Both 'incremental' and 'increase' mean rising, it is unnatural to use these next to each other.
2) Because this is an discuss - both - views essay, your overview must include your statement of discussing both of them, I think you should delay your own perspective and put it in the conclusion.
3) However, your paraphrasing of the topic sentence is excellent.
4) You have lexical resources. Your usage of words is great and appropriate. You also use many types of structures well.
5) Your ideas are well organised, very clear. Good job!
