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Distance between family members is extremely increasing nowadays.


marned 4 / 10 4  
Jun 13, 2015   #1
The extend family is less important now than it was in the past. Do you agree or disagree!

The pressure of modern life is making family smaller. Because, technology growing refines method of life. As little as 50 years ago, people lived in the extended family gratifyingly. From my perspective, I believe that the extended family is somewhat less vital now than it was before. There are many compelling reasons that I mentioned in following.

First of all, people tend to be free and independent, far from other inferences. All individuals like to be responsible about their life. Also, people tend to have emancipated living. My mother's family life method is a good example. They used to living in a big mansion with lots of rooms. All members of family including grandparents, uncles, cousins and aunts lived together. So, they could not make decision independently. Mostly, the oldest person was responsible of making decision and others had to obey and respect to his idea. Although, other individuals of family felt that they are less valuable especially women.

Second of all, cities are developed and then distance of family members is increased. It is the result of a state-of-the-art life. For example, I am far from my grandparents and other family. Consequently, we cannot be in touch with other closely. Technology is a great help and we have a widespread means for communication. Mostly, we are contacting each other by phone, email and social networks. We usually visit each other once in a year. Because, there is no enough time and financial resources is limited. Accordingly, there are many striking contrast between today living style and what was in the past. Life style in modern world is altered.

As the aforementioned examples show, the extended families is less important in compare with what they was in the past. Because, distance between family members are extremely increased, and also, people tend to be more free and independent.

justivy03 - / 2,367 607  
Jun 13, 2015   #2
Marned, first of all, good job in coming up with an essay. However, I notice that your title itself needs work already. Please find it below;

- The extendextended family is less important now than it was in the past. Do you agree or disagree!

- There are many compelling reasons that I mentionedwill mention in following.

- Mostly, the oldest person was responsible of making decision and others had to obey and respect to his idea.

- Although,This leaves other individuals of the family felt that they are less valuable especially women.

- Second of allNext , cities are developed and then distance of family members is increased.

- Consequently, we cannot be in touch with each other closely.

- Technology is a great help and we have a widespreadwith different means forof communicationwe are able to communicate well .

- Mostly, we are contacting each other by phone, email and social networks. We usually visit each other once in a year.

- Because, there is nonot enough time and financial resources isare limited.

- Accordingly, there are many striking contrast between todaytoday's living style and what was in the past.

- As the aforementioned examples show, the extended families is less important in compare with what they wascompared with how they are in the past.

Okay, now that I have made corrections, I have a few more points that, hopefully, will help you in future writing;

- starting your sentence with "because", is not a common way to start a sentence

- rather than starting a sentence with "because", cut your sentence using punctuation marks such as comma (,) in order to stress the following idea and to avoid starting a sentence with "because".

- mind your linking verbs as this will affect your sentence to a certain degree

- proof read

Keep writing

Cheers!!!
OP marned 4 / 10 4  
Jun 21, 2015   #3
thanks for your recommendations. I will try to use them in my writing.


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