Unanswered [3] | Urgent [0]
  

Home / Writing Feedback   % width Posts: 4

HAVE YOUR EATING HABITS CHANGED SINCE YOU'VE BEEN IN COLLEGE?


zoh 3 / 2  
Jul 15, 2008   #1
Yes, I believe that I have changed eating habits since I've been in College. There are two reasons why I did change. One reason is that I want to be kept better life because it's an important to the right food for health in daily and second reasons; I need to decrease my weight.

Firstly, when I began college in Washington, DC, I had generally healthy eating habits, a product of having lived with my parents as Pakistan and Canada food. In my first month of college life, I tried to continue these habits even though I noticed myself that I dislike to eat American foods such as junks, burgers, too higher calories, and not similar Canada or Pakistan foods. I realized that I have an increased about closed to 15 pounds in the end of semester. Hence, I ate some chocolate cake and ordered pizza deliveryman. These are not health food.

Fortunately, since my first year, I have learned that I will have to adjust the right foods for change habits. I also take responsibility for my own eating habits. I now know how to change habits. That means my mom will not be able to watch over my shoulder to make sure I have eaten my carrots instead of slipping them to the dog; I will have to do that job for her.

In conclusion, I reckon I did change for eating habits since I attended at second year of college. I have also realized that when I eat better, I need to be careful with my health what calories I usually food for daily. I felt like to begin more dependable and do better in the future.

EF_Team5 - / 1,586  
Jul 16, 2008   #2
Firstly, when I began college in Washington, DC I had generally healthy eating habits, a product of having lived with my parents and eating Pakistani and Canadian foods. Why is this healthier? Give a couple examples: there is less fat, how it is cooked, etc. In my first month of college life, I tried to continue these habits. I dislike American foods such as junk food and burgers because they are too high in calories, and are different than the foods I was used to at home.As the foods I was accustomed to at home were not available at college, I found myself eating chocolate cake and ordering pizza often, neither of which are health foods. By the end of the semester, I realized I gaineed about 15 pounds.

Fortunately since my first year, I have learned that I have to adjust my eating habits to include the right foods. I also take responsibility for my own eating habits. That means my mom will not be able to watch over my shoulder to make sure I have eaten my carrots instead of slipping them to the dog; I will have to do that job for her.

In conclusion, I reckon I did change my eating habits since I began attending college.I have also realized that in order to eat better, I need to watch what I eat and be careful how many calories I usually eat in a day. I also need to make sure that the foods I choose are healthy choices. Because of this experience I feel like I can be more dependable and do better in the future ."

I did do good deal of rewriting here; I think I was able to keep your ideas and meaning intact. If not, let me know and we can work through it again. Your ideas are good, but I am assuming English is not your native language, and as such the order of your words and such kind of get jumbled up. You do a good job of relating your personal experience in the essay; you are able to pinpoint your weaknesses and are able to work on them and turn them into strengths. This is a valuable trait that will serve you well in all areas of your life; you are very fortunate as not many people have this! Keep up your good work!
OP zoh 3 / 2  
Jul 16, 2008   #3
Thanks for editing my essay.. Actually, I am deaf :)
I have to take several practices on essay before begin college this August.
EF_Team5 - / 1,586  
Jul 24, 2008   #4
Well kudos to you anyway! You still did a great job!

The more you practice and write essays the more familiar with the process you will become, and thus you can't help but become a better writer. It won't take as long as you probably think, so as long as you keep working on it you can't go anywhere but up! Feel free to post here anytime you need any kind of writing help!


Home / Writing Feedback / HAVE YOUR EATING HABITS CHANGED SINCE YOU'VE BEEN IN COLLEGE?