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Effect of the Internet in human's live - information anytime and anywhere; IELTS TEST 2


Putuariska 2 / 3  
Jun 18, 2016   #1
Internet makes human lives more convenient. Do you agree or disagree?

Human activities become easier because of the internet. Some people agree yet the others are against that idea. While the internet provides many an easy way to access information, I rather believe that it also makes human become lazy.

Information that we need, can be accessed easily due to internet. This is because the internet requires much more information in one package. For example, if we want to know information about news, sport, and technology, we can browse them in google, while video and music can be explored in Youtube. We do not need to turn on television or buy a newspaper. Therefore, the internet gives us a simple option to obtain more information anytime and anywhere.

The convenience of internet, in the other side, makes human become lazy. It is because we just need to type a keyword and everything will appear in a few seconds, although we do not know about the truth of the information. I personally experiences before, as a student, I had so many assignments related to journal and paper. To finish my homework, I just need to type the keyword in google machine and there would so many sites that could answer my question. Because it was so easy, I rarely read a book or went to library to get more information. It not only makes me become lazy but also lack of knowledge. Therefore, the internet causes people become lazy due to its practical.

To conclude, even though internet provided a simple way to finish all of people's business, I tend to argue that its convenience encourages human not to trying too hard to obtain their goals. Where possible, it is better if people use internet wisely and effectively.

ichanpants89 [Contributor] 16 / 777 309  
Jun 18, 2016   #2
Putu, I would like to point out some of your weaknesses in your essay in order to strengthen your essay development later in the next practice. It is described as follows:

- Your essay can be classified or categorized as an essay which has unclear stance. It is suggested to state or mention your point on view clearly in agree or disagree question. For example, you can directly say 'I firmly agree with the idea of ...... because of .... and ...." This will help you gain adequate band score for task response.

- It is also suggested for an academic essay to reduce the usage of personal pronouns such as we, our, us, I, and you. It is okay if it is only for stating your point of view in introduction and conclusion, but using it in the whole paragraph is a disaster. It will be categorized as informal essay not an academic one. Therefore, you need to avoid using it carelessly.

As seen, two weaknesses have been pointed out clearly. I hope it will be helpful towards your writing development. Good luck for the next practice. :)


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