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Elderly people can't enjoy their life enough due to lack of strength, energy and confidence

Michele9 5 / 12 3  
Jul 21, 2015   #1
People experience different aspects of life according to their sex, attitudes and, above all, age. When people age, things change and they cannot live the situations the same way they did as young adults. I affirm this on account of several reasons and now I am going to explain my opinion.

First of all, by the time people are old they have already lost many opportunities. In fact I think some experiences and circumstances are possible only during specific periods of the life and when someone overcomes one of these phases, the related situations will never come back again. In this regard I often keep in mind a quote from an ancient greek poet who used to say: "if you lose an opportunity, well that opportunity is lost forever". For example a friend of mine after graduation decided to enroll in the Law School of the university of my city, in spite of the fact that writing was his true passion. He picked that faculty as his parents pressured him for they wanted him to be a lawyer. However by now, even though he has already graduated in Law, he regrets that choice. He has not lived the time of the university as a light-hearted and serene period and now it is too late to go back and live the university the way he wanted it to be.

Secondly, when people grow older they become less instinctive and they overthink before acting. This attitude impedes to fully live the life. Indeed, people become more responsible. One example is when someone becomes parent. In that case he or she begins to think that he/she should be more careful because his/her actions or choices might have consequences also on his/her children.

Lastly, older people are often more scared and I think that living in the fear corresponds to not to live at all. As far I am concerned, sometimes the experience and previous mistakes bring people to take less risks. For instance, after I had a car crash I have always avoided to drive the car when I could because the incident shocked me too much.

In conclusion, I deem that young people live the life more than old prople do because they possess the strength, the energy and the confidence to get involved in every kinds of situations the life presents to them.

lcturn87 - / 435 236  
Jul 22, 2015   #2
I would like to assist you in making some corrections. When you begin your essay I think you need to simply state,"... according to their age." I am going to suggest deleting, "the situations" or you can state "live the situations in life the same way" in this paragraph.

Change this sentence to:" In fact, I..." When you are making the changes as suggested previously it should read, "during specific periods of life when". Remember to place commas after transition words (i.e. For Example, However, etc.). Law school can be in all lowercase letters. I think you should replace faculty with university. Delete "by now". The last sentence is too confusing. Here is a suggestion: "He has not enjoyed the lighthearted and serene experience of university life, and now it is too late to go back and live it the way he wanted to be".

Do you mean think before acting? You could say, "This attitude impedes one from living life fully." Place "a" before parent. The next sentence is too confusing because of he/she and his/her. Revise this sentence:"... a parent may become more careful because the consequences of his or her actions or choices could affect the his/her children." This is just a suggestion to help you reduce overuse of those words.

"living in fear corresponds to not living at all."

"always avoided driving the car"

These corrections will help you improve your essay. Good use of transition words!


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