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Email and text messaging threats written language


malek1406 1 / 1  
Mar 3, 2010   #1
If there any mistake ...please help me to improve it ...
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Today, communication technologies are becoming more popular around the world .This replaced a traditional method of communication in the past. Email and text message are new ways for contact these days. The aim of this essay is to discuss the positive and negative of mobile cell and electronic mail.

Some people believe that contact between people is easier than before. In the past, people used to communicate with each other by sending letter which took a time to deliver .Also, they were preferring direct speech than any other method because its faster and to avoid delayed to transfer the information.

There are several advantages of using email and send a text message to contact people. First of all, these technologies might be saving our time. This could keep us to contact with our friends, families and colleagues at anytime and anywhere. Another positive point is that sending email and message are cheaper and sometimes without cost. For example, some telecommunication companies are making a good offer when people have contact with them like free text messages. Finally, it has a great value of features such as people can transfer considerable information for many friends at the same time which could not happen in traditional ways.

However, there are also some disadvantages of using these technologies. Firstly, students who addict for using mobile cell and electronic mail could affect their written language in future. This might be convert to a serious threaten of their writing at schools and universities when they have assignment or essay because they using abbreviation and short form. Moreover, people might be losing an official formula of writing in their lives. Due to using message and email as daily habit, people could fail when they faced a real situation of writing, for instance, in exam at their studying.

In conclusion, it is clear from the above that there is a slight threat of using email and text messaging to the status of written language because people using these technologies more than before. In addition, people have to take the benefits from these technologies and keep their traditional writing.

knich6 - / 3  
Mar 3, 2010   #2
FIRST PARAGRAPH

This replaced a traditional method of communication in the past.
The aim of this essay is to discuss the positive and negative of mobile cell and electronic mail.

The reason i crossed these two sentences out is because the first sentence is unnecessary and the second is too vague to use as a thesis and you shouldn't use "the aim of this esssy" in an essay. Maybe state some positives and negatives of the mobile cell and electronic mail.

SECOND PARAGRAPH

dont use a between took and time. dont put also in your third sentence of your second paragraph. "its" would be it's but you never use contractions in an essay so, it is. dont say to avoid. (akward phrase)

THIRD PARAGRAPH

send needs to be sending.

FOURTH PARAGRAPH

firstly? that should be first.
*students who areaddictedfor to could can effect (i think) future assignments. this might be convert to a serious threaten

CONCLUSION

use something other then in addition.

OVERALL

it was okay. it needs to be longer though and you have alot of mistakes to fix.
usalma2002 9 / 21  
Mar 4, 2010   #3
Good job. I like the way how you made paragraphing your ideas.
EF_Kevin 8 / 13,335 129  
Mar 4, 2010   #4
Well, I think this sentence is okay. You ca start like this:
Email and text messaging have replaced the traditional method of communication that were used in the past.

This sentence can be improved:
Also, they were preferring people of the past used direct speech more than any other method, because its faster and to avoid delays in the transfer of information.

First of all, these technologies might be saving our time. This could keep us in contact with ...

However, there are also some disadvantages of using these technologies. Firstly, if students become addicted to using mobile cell and electronic mail, this could affect their written language in future.

This might be convert to a serious threat to their writing at schools and universities when they have an assignment or essay, because they use a bbreviations and short nonstandard form. Moreover, people ...

In conclusion, it is clear from the above that there is a slight threat that comes with using email and ...

In addition, people have to take the benefits from these technologies and keep their traditional writing.------- tis is a good sentence!! Good ending.

:-)
OP malek1406 1 / 1  
Mar 6, 2010   #5
thank you so much....


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