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Energy consumption in the US - IELTS WRITING TASK 1 - LINE GRAPH

Henry1707 1 / -  
Oct 28, 2020   #1

Energy consumption by fuel

The line graph illustrates data on 6 types of energy consumption in the US during the period between 1980 and 2030.
Overall, it is clear that the consumption of natural resources namely nuclear, solar/wind and hydro power are predicted to witness a slight change until the last period. Meanwhile, the climb in natural gas, coal and petrol are particularly significant.

As can be seen, petrol and oil were the most popular in the first period with 35 quadrillion units, which was followed by natural gas with 20 quadrillions units. In contrast, the amount of nuclear, solar/wind, hydropower was much lower from remaining sources, approximately 4 quadrillion units.

Despite the first-hand advantage, there was a rapid fluctuation in both natural gas and petrol and oil until 2020 , whereas the rest recorded an increase. After that, the gap between those surveyed is expected to widen significantly toward the end of the period, more specifically, in 2030, the amount of petrol and oil consumption will reach its peak of approximately 48 quadrillion units, which is nearly 10 times higher than hydropower.

Holt  Educational Consultant - / 10,531 3446  
Oct 28, 2020   #2
The summary paragraph is good, but you failed to explain the importance of the "significant" statement. It is an incomplete presentation. There is no reason for you to say that the increase is significant. You should present that information in comparison to a downtrend at least.

Remove references to the image with "As can be seen" because you are being asked to create an imagined image of the graph in the thoughts of the reader. Just be direct to the point. Be more descriptive in your information presentation. Use a bit of creativity to help with the mental image creation. Don't just hit the reader with facts. Balance imagination with data.

Your 3 paragraph presentation is composed of run-on sentences. You should learn to divide the paragraph into individual sentences. Make sure you use one topic per sentence to help you deliver a clearer presentation and an easier to follow information analysis.

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