Energy waste in a house is caused by many electrical installations and also windows

IELTS Task 1 : Heat loss and Energy Wasted in A House

The diagram shows how heat is lost and energy wasted in a house because of air getting into and out of the house. In general, a house can waste much energy and loss the heat that caused by air cycle. The leaking of air that is released from the house is more than get in.

The leaking of air has a significant impact to heat lost in a house. Many rooms releasing less heat than others especially the bottom room. Heat rise up into room on top. Air leaking out of the house passes through the plumbing stack vent, bathroom fan vent, dryer vent, and kitchen van fent. However, air leaking into the house through the doors and the windows.

Energy wasted in a house caused by many electrical installation such as recessed lights, attic hatch, and electrical outlet. The number of windows affect energy that used. More light that enters the room enabling use less energy.

Hi Hikmatyar.
These are my corrections.

... energy and loss the heat that (THE OMITTING METHOD) caused by air cycle. The leaking LEAK of THE air that is released from the house is more than IT WHICH getS in.

The leaking of THE air LEAKAGE has a significant impact to ON (YOU SHOULD CHECK THE COLLOCATION OF "IMPACT) heat lost in a THE house. Many rooms releasing RELEASE less heat than others ...

THE Heat riseS up into THE room on THE top. Air leaking out THE LECK OF THE AIR IS OUT of the house (...) stack vent, A bathroom fan vent, dryer vent, and kitchen van fent VENT. However, air leaking THOSE ARE into the house through ...

THE Energy IS wasted in a house caused by many electrical installationS such as recessed ...
The number of windows affectS ON energy that used THE USE OF THE ENERGY. More light that enters the room enabling ...

Note: Pay Attention to:
1. Verb Agreement
2. The use of the article
3. The use of conjunction (include omitting and reducing)
4. The meaning of the sentences. Please, you meet the appropriate words to arrange your sentence.
5. Collocation of the word---- For example Effect/Impact---- On