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England and Wales - household and accommodation 1981-2001

nqnson 1 / 1  
Feb 21, 2020   #1

households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales

The bar chart illustrates the proportion of English and Welsh households with and without accommodation from 1981 to 2001.

Overall, it is noticed that households in temporary accommodation is significantly higher than households in owned accommodation on the first half of the period. However, on the second half of the timescale, owned accommodation replaced rented one to become preference of family in England and Wales.

With regard to households in rented accommodation, they accounted for around 75% in 1918, this proportion then dropped dramatically to 50% in 1971 before reaching the bottom of just over 30% in 2001. Despite the drop, it managed to slightly recover to 35% 10 years after 1971.

On the other hand, initially families living in owned house were minorities, at around 22% in 1918. This trend generally rose for the next 53 years with the year 1918 when with-accommodation households overtook households living in rented accommodation in percentage terms, at 60% and 40% respectively.

Devaii 2 / 6  
Feb 21, 2020   #2
While the information seems ok, it'd be helpful if you added the prompt? Then I'd be able to see what exactly you're supposed to do.
OP nqnson 1 / 1  
Feb 21, 2020   #3
Sorry, i'm terrible to forgert it

The chart below shows the percentage of households in owned and rented accommodation in England and Wales between 1918 and 2011.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisions where relevant.
Holt  Educational Consultant - / 13,858 4558  
Feb 22, 2020   #4
Do not use terms of uncertainty in an essay that requires you to be precise with your data presentation. Remember, this essay is based on a measured bar graph, with actual numerical references, use those details only. Don't create uncertainty when there is no need to to so. Each paragraph should be composed of at least 3 sentences. That is the minimum sentence requirement per paragraph, with a maximum of 5. You could have easily achieved a higher word count and a better GRA score if you had use the 3 sentence presentation for the paragraphs. Instead, you opted to go the run-on sentence route, which created cohesiveness and coherence problems in your presentation.

Using one sentence topic per paragraph, explained using connected data will always give more chances for your writing to be considered on a higher score bracket for the scoring considerations. In this instance, you lost points instead. Practice using periods in place of commas. You will see that when you use a period, you create a break in the presentation that helps enhance the clarity of the discussion, and also allows the reader to better understand what you have to read. By creating a page skimming friendly presentation, you could very well boost your overall scores.

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