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Nowadays, the environment where people live affects them so much


Tillie 3 / 5 1  
Feb 9, 2015   #1
Some people prefer to live in a small town, Others prefer to live in a big city. Which place would you prefer to live in? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

Nowadays, the environment where people live affects them so much. Some people love living in a peaceful place such as a small town but others love a busy life like in a big city. Living in a small town or in a big city both has the beneficial and unfavourable effects. I believe that living in a big city is better by the way it gives people more choices, high education and good transportation.

Initially, It gives people more selections in many different cases. It is generally known that in the city, people feel happy because their needs are always met. To illustrate, when people are in an emergency situation, their friend has a heart attack. They take him to the hospital, with modern devices and skillful doctors, he is not in the dangerous situation anymore. Hence, the importance of the first point is not refusable.

Subsequently, living in a big city gives better transportation than in a small town. With the developed technology in transportation, people now find it convenient to travel in a big city. Aside the movement, people can also choose the suitable transportation which is cheaper or more comfortable.

Ultimately, knowledge becomes more and more important to people. Through knowledge, people can assess other people about their status in society. Consequently, there is a question that where people can improve their knowledge. Definitely it is in the city, the studying environment in the city is always higher than any environment. In a city, people can approach totally new educational programs. After finishing these curriculums, their knowledge will be improved.

Taking all the aforementioned points to the account, Living both in a big city and a small town is good for people. However, Living in the big city is more interesting and gives people more benefits.

mumtazdinar 12 / 15 12  
Feb 9, 2015   #2
Hi Tillie,

Some advice for your writing:

Before you submit to the forum, you have to make your paragraph easy to read. Kindly to separate the first paragraph, second, third, etc.

Living in a small town or in a big city both

Living in both of a small town or a big city

I believe that living in a big city is better by the way it gives people more choices, high education and good transportation.

Comparative: better ... than ....
I believe that living in a big city is better facilities than in a small town, because the big city provides high education and good transportation to the people.

he is not in the dangerous situation anymore

he is not in dangerous situation

Good Luck !!!
Rich Monte 2 / 93 2  
Feb 10, 2015   #3
There are some weaknesses in your writing.

You need to focus on your vocabulary. For pragmatic instance, in lieu of writing the word from the prompt for several times which is a big city, and a small city. You could have written urban area, or suburban area. The studying environment in the city is always (better) than any environment

Do not forget to divide your body paragraphs properly.

Living both in a big city and a small town is good for people. This sentence somehow contradicts your whole essay. If you want to choose big city, then bias about it, it is futile to say they are both good e.t.c

To illustrate, when people are in an emergency situation, their friend has a heart attack.It does not sound coherent. Let us give it a try, To illustrate, it might turn out that their friend all of a sudden suffers a heart attack. I think now you see what does coherence mean.

Good luck! Not bad overall!


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